Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Look Out

here comes tomorrow...

ok so Paula Lopez has lost her focus a bit lately.. I read on Noozhawk she was busted for DIP....being drunk in public..well most people are DIP but at least Paula had the sense not to drive while she was DIP!!

 
I wish her well and am here to help but the thing that got me was the mug shot.. I've never seen Paula looking so sexy..that smirk!! awesome..I'm serious...

look at Erin Brockovich's mugshot after she was busted for DUI- driving a powerboat drunk in June!!..she looks like Nick Nolte! yuck!!

but Paula like I said looks pretty fine in her mugshot...some women got it, some women don't!

and besides, it's Fiesta with all the Tequila festivals and drinking, everybody will be drunk! even I might get drunk but I promise you I won't drive drunk!

but the bottom line is drinking to self-medicate does not work and if that's what Paula was doing then she needs to stop..but if she was drinking to...ya know, just to drink well who cares, she didn't hurt anybody...even Buddhist monks have one day a year when they get drunk and carouse and cavort around the hillsides...

ok so being a public personality like Paula..well this incident may lose her a few hosting jobs for Fiesta, but it also may be a chance for a new beginning..I think that's what Paula really wants..a new beginning...

and she deserves one...

green tambourine

listen while I play play play play.....

so I've mentioned a the SB Botanic Garden a few times recently and now ol' Lanny Ebenstein has some praise for the new leadership there.. I do not join him in his praise..and Lanny's knowledge of plants is limited to pot and how to grow weed in pot houses!! I 've documented this hoochhound's problem for years, so anything he writes in the News-Press is delusion which I enjoy pointing out!

now...listen to me closely: I love avocados! I don't give a rat's ass if they are are native or not native..and neither should you


Crossing the border

spooky cool avocado grove

Persea americana (avocado) originated in south-central Mexico, with evidence of the fruit existing there and in Peru as early as 500 and 750 BC. In 1871, Judge R.B. Ord of Santa Barbara successfully introduced avocados to the U.S. with trees from Mexico. By the 1950s, about 25 types of the green-skinned fruit were commercially packed and shipped in California, with the fuerte variety accounting for more than two-thirds of production. California currently produces 90 percent of the U.S. avocado crop, and the Hass variety accounts for about 80 percent of avocados eaten worldwide. How has one variety come to dominate the world's avocado palate?

how? because it's friggin monoculture, that's how

so...the Botanic Garden used to be about plants, hence botanic..ie the study of plants-
after the poor conservative leadership got ahold of the facilities, the focus shifted to "native only plants"...ie plants that have a tough time surviving in the real world..



Lanny's News-Press editorial was full of nonsense as usual...he claims that the eastern side of the garden is more like the Channel Islands than the west, the Channel Islands plant section will be moved to the east side! translation: the plants ain't surviving on the west side!! so I guess they are native on the east side of the Botanic Garden but non-native on the west side of the garden..haha what silliness..

plant-life from around the world should be celebrated not feared!!!


Botanic Garden's Odd New Director, Steve Windhager


and of course with the last go-round board members like Fife Symington, a con and friend of the News-Press, brought much dishonor to the Botanic Garden... a beautiful place was tarnished by corrupt leadership..the newest CEO, a guy named Steve Windhager is from Texas of all places!! and he has some baggage

Windhager's claim to fame in Texas was coming up with a weedless turf that Walmart wanted to use in front of all its stores! and he wants to change all the rooftops in Santa Barbara to green roofs: The benefits of using a native green roof don’t extend to regional plants and ecosystems alone. Many innovative developers are turning to green roofs to save on energy costs (plants lower roof temperature by absorbing and reflecting the sun’s rays and transpiring), extend roof life, and help with stormwater runoff. Windhager said that, applied across an entire city, green roofs could have major impacts on the urban heat island effect and provide inner city habitat for other native species.

and he supported a giant controversial development over an important aquifer in Texas by Advanced Micro Devices and actually became a consultant for them..

but he had critics: (Of course, the most significant Austin development threatening to pollute the aquifer is none other than AMD's enormous new facility, being built off Southwest Parkway.)

In dry weather, the water clears. Barton Springs is still a marvel of nature but one that's been damaged by man, by our urbanization over a karst limestone aquifer. If AMD moves to Stratus/Freeport's Southwest Parkway land, there will be more urbanization of thousands of acres, and more pollution of Barton Springs


http://www.austinchronicle.com/news/2005-12-23/321291/


"None of the greenbuilding tricks will do a thing to address the off-site pollution from secondary growth catalyzed by AMD's development, from AMD's own employees driving back and forth across the aquifer, or from the hundreds of millions of dollars in highway construction projects that will be necessary to support a satellite [downtown region] on Southwest Parkway," said Bill Bunch, executive director of the Save Our Springs Alliance, one of the most vocal opponents of the project.

But another environmentalist, Steve Windhager, director of landscape restoration with the Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center and a consultant on the AMD project, countered that the company will set a new standard for development in the area. "I tend to think we can provide a real model for other development ... my hope is to make this the new standard."

others disagreed:

"If AMD can locate in the Barton Springs watershed, why not other large employers?" he continued. "Twenty five years of community planning will be thrown out the window. No good can come of any project of this scale that begins with so much arrogance, deception, and disrespect for the community."

my biggest problem is these clowns have started the Beer Boutique parties at the garden....the recent one was funded by a local non-profit the Hutton-Parker Foundation...and really is this necessessary to have sanctioned beer parties at the garden...ever drive up Mission Canyon? you need to be sober to negotiate the twists and turns, not high on beer..and at least when Paula Lopez gets drunk, she doesn't drive! way to go, Paula!! (I'll have more on Paula later as I'm starting to find her very sexy and wild!!)

this doesn't bode well for the future of the Botanic Garden and unless the community wakes up to the derelict leaders they keep installing, the real Botanic Garden will be a thing of the past...it's about plants..all plants

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

hang five

dododoodoo..doo doo doo doo

Surf Riots..the new rage!!!

 

EYEWITNESS ACCOUNT: HUNTINGTON BEACH RIOTS
http://www.surfline.com/surf-news/eyewitness-account-huntington-beach-riots_99857/


"Then a huge fight broke out, everybody was swinging on everybody - that's when the cops started throwing tear gas."

-- Andy Leavelle, Sakal Surfboards shop employeeAs the crowd moved north, "they were ripping out every single stop sign, they tried to flip a truck in front of the post office (unsuccessfully), kicked over all the newsstands," Leavelle said. "Then they knocked over the stop sign in front of Easy Rider bike shop and threw it through the window and stole one bike. They tried to steal another one, but the locals got 'em before they could."

ok so in Huntington Beach, at a US Surf Open, a riot broke out...a bunch of slacker white guys drunk on beer went crazy!! the Beer Culture you may have heard about! haha

they threw little temper tantrums, the spoiled brats, over-turned portapotties, threw bottles and rocks...a bunch of little shits rioting for NO REASON!! at least black people riot for cause..geez

the beer culture swept thru the mellow streets of Huntington Beach and destroyed businesses, some cops were injured...but order was restored after the cops became the babysitters...

hey the Surf n Suds Beer Festival is coming up in Carpinteria.. I call it the Suds n Duds Festival..apparently there's a burgeoning surf and beer culture growing among the surf and beer crowd...and a few folks showed up at the Beer Boutique event at the Botanical Garden...you can drink beer while staring at Mission Creek...and the native plants...the beer was being poured from ice coolers! anything for a fix for a burgeoning alcoholic...

a realtor in Carp was busted for DUI...no surprise the guy's got a KING sized problem that he has decided to take to the streets..that's when I get involved....drink to your heart's content, or your liver, but don't drive or else I'll hound your dumbass..

hey grab a summer Shandy and join us out here!!

Monday, July 29, 2013

backstreets

Sleeping in that old abandoned beach house getting wasted in the heat

Shark's...that is a cool beach off Fernald's Point...we used to surf there all the time as kids..the little abandoned beach cottages were cool...getting wasted in the heat

and even though it was called Shark's, I never saw one or heard of anyone getting eaten by one...still the name is very romantic...it's a great place to hang out...Shark's...



now fast forward to today and we got animal saviors like WendyMcCuckoo and Peter Howorth of the News-Press and Marine Mammal Center..apparently Peter sees a problem with sharks killing marine mammals and the possible threat to humans! oh, I attended the Shark symposium in Carp at the Plaza Theater, and Pete looked like big dumb farmer, but most of the info was easily obtained in a first course of high school Oceanography...you learn sharks are predators and scavengers..and they keep the balance in the ocean. especially when stupid humans try to save everything...the animal rights wackos like Wendy don't get the food chain...let me make it simple for them: if you club a puppy to death, that's animal abuse; if a shark kills a seal, that's not!

so I read in Sunday's News-Press that Peter Howorth and his cohorts are working a on a "Shark Warning System"...the Marine Mammal Center is a non-profit that needs money to save the sea lions and seals, so why not blame the sharks and issue warnings that you're next on the menu if you venture into the water..well duh, that's ALWAYS a possibility since you are entering their domain....again, it's the food chain thing but the number of shark attacks on humans is low, so the chances are slim you'll be attacked..it's possible but a warning system is just plain silly..these folks try to make themselves look inportant like they are protecting you and your kids from sharks, but they aren't...at all


and Howorth and his pals don't even address all the artifical reefs close to shore that may attract sharks....

now, I was thinking about artificial reef balls...we do seem to have lots of little kids running around at the beach and everywhere and I had an idea for an artificial reef..it would serve two purposes..reduce the over-population of children and make the beaches safer for adults like Peter Howorth and Wendy...

see, you take some kids and put them in the new concrete reef ball...the balls are painted yellow for fun!

then drop them into the ocean a few hundred yards off  Leadbetter and presto...the sharks are satisfied, the parents are happy with a few less kids to worry about, and the swimmers are free to surf and swim without worrying about a shark attack!

I think it's a modest proposal

Sunday, July 28, 2013

To Domatio

Στο δωμάτιο αυτό που έζησα μαζί σου στο δωμάτιο αυτό ομίχλη πέφτει

the French Festival was a few weeks ago and now we have the Greek Festival...of course I will not attend becasue they are having wine tasting and as any French person kows, wine tasting is simply unnecessary and a waste of good wine...some pain some beurre and some vin and a pretty girl and you got a picnic!


these Greek girls need a shave!

 
but the real reason I won't go Greek this weekend is the Greek women are kinda hairy and dirty like they need a bath...don't get me wrong I like some dirt and hair on a girl, but the sight of gals dancing around Oak Park with beards and mustaches is just too unsettling for me...and when they lift their arms?? MAMA MIA!! they look like big burly mechanics! and there's always family around Greeks...they smother you... and they like to dip everything in olive oil..everything!! really what have the Greeks ever done for me??

then on the Sports page of the News-Press I see a weird headline : Kershaw rolls Reds like Joe McCarthy...so the Dodgers beat the Reds and some guy at the News-Press writes the headline and refers to Joe McCarthy as a hero??


McCarthy was the nut who went after commies (REDS) hiding in Hollywood and the Congress in the 1950s....McCarthy was the original teabagger and I know many conservatives actually believed in Joe McCarthy's witchhunt, but this is bizarre stuff from the News-Press.. I know Gerry Fall is the Sports guy over there..a Wendy brown-noser if there ever was one..and a chain-smoker..and dumb as a sack of shit...he probably wrote the headline!! does the News-Press think the Cincinnati Reds are commies???


Becoming the symbol of the unprincipled master of the "witch hunt" ( playwright Arthur Miller would implicitly compare the McCarthy era to the witch trials of an earlier era in America in "The Crucible"), McCarthy became ever more grandiose in his ambitions and self-destructive in his alcoholism over the next few years. He finally destroyed himself by his overreaching and incoherent performance in the Army-McCarthy hearings which riveted the nation in 1954.

grandiose and alcoholic-just the kinda guy Wendy would love!!

well it's all Greek to me....

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Proud Mary

cleaned alot of plates in Memphis...

so sometimes I like to drive through Montecito Village to get to Carp... I grew up here, on Coast Village Road, so why not...when I was a teen, I washed dishes at Sam's Scoop right down the road from Randy Van Wolfswinkel!



at Sam's Scoop, the waitress flirted with me alot..she was an older blonde in her late twenties..Mary I think her name was.. and lordy I would have lasted about two seconds with that gal...so Sam tells me one day to take this hairless dog that was hanging around the back of the restaurant.. it was a little homeless mutt someone dumped...he tells me go get rid of it..to kill it! so I quit the next day and no I didn't kill the dog.. I grabbed some bacon and took him to the Butterfly beach underpass where he lived happliy ever after I think...at least I got him away from Sam...he was a cool dog!

oh I washed lots of dishes in my teens...worked at the Big Yellow House and that was fun.. I recall Don Turner the big friendly guy with curly hair was the manager..he'd always come back and check on us..the waitresses would bring back food and almost empty carafes of wine and washing dishes and big pots and pans was pretty fun in those days, with those pretty cornbread girls..ahhhhhhh...wine, women and song!

Craig McCaw's fantastic new eatery "Oliver's"!
but anyway when I go through Montecito these days...oh, the neighborhood has gone downhill with all these drunk rightwingers moving in, and I see lots of dogs and skinny white women with huge high heels and really skintight pants...and big puffy faces and lips

I guess most of the normal folks are long gone...but I always pass by Peabody's restaurant which is closed..it was bought by Craig McCaw, the creepy, strange-weird whale-loving UFO-loving and very rich ex-husband of the equally bonkers Wendy McCaw..how'd we get so lucky to have these two clowns move here???

I am not impressed with their wealth but they certainly are...they live in a prison it seems with all their gold and gates.. I feel sorry for them, I pity them, I spit on both of them...

ok so Peabody's was sold to Craig McCaw last year or so and there's still a green tarp over a portion of the building...it's a small restaurant but why is it taking so long to open?? the new name will be "Oliver's" which is Craig's middle name, but I don't think the restaurant will open..ever
I know they blamed the permitting process (anti-gov MO) but I'm thinking that these superduper rich guys just dabble in this stuff and never finish what they start..like Ty Warner took five years to remodel his orange hacienda on Channel Drive..burned down one of his houses and failed at restoring the Miramar, blaming the permit process again

this is proof that excessive wealth turns you into an idiot....
well these folks certainly aren't smart like me anyways

Thursday, July 25, 2013

new world man

He's a rebel and a runner
He's a signal turning green
He's a restless young romantic
Wants to run the big machine



only Pete's hairdresser knows if he's 56 or 65!
 
 
ok so Peter Lance is hopping around town signing books, first at Granada Books and then at Tecelote Bookshop in Montecito's upper village...then Chaucer's...all bookstores I will now boycott!! or BOOKCOTT!!

of course I'm not going to read Lance's drivel because he seems to write the same things over and over again..all to expose our corrupt government...

his "new" book is called Deal with the Devil

when Lance said on the Mr. Wimpy Show that he was a guest on Coast to Coast, a radio show that caters to conspiracy theories and UFOs, I wasn't surprised...when he said the listeners thought his gov't conspiracy theories were most popular, I was amused

here's some stuff on Lance's "new" book....it appears Pete is rebranding an old book and trying to pass it off as new, using the publicity he got from Wendy and Nipper!!

from the web: Where was the Editor?
I have read a dozen true crime books at least and am mystified at how garbled and repetitive and difficult to follow this book is. It reads as if all the notes were gathered into chapters and someone just copied them with very little attention to anything else.

rebranded
If you read (2008) ISBN-10: 0061455342 titled "Six Six Six: The FBI Agent, the Mob Killer, and the Bloody Alliance the Feds Tried to Hide" .... then you have read this book.
It has been re-titled and republished under this new title "Deal With The Devil".

well some sick, demented and ultimately ginned-up people may have compassion for Peter Lance...feel sorry for the sniveling little simp, but not me...no suh!!

and he knows damn well not to come to Carpinteria and try to put on his little act here...because I'll be waiting, somewhere, hiding in the shadows...

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

smoke from a distant fire

This lying, and cryin', it's upsettin' and gettin' ya no where
It don't stack up, so slack up and pack up
I just don't care
Don't let the screen door hit you, on your way out.
Don't you drown when your dream boat runs onto the ground


now I know some people hate ice plant..hate it..they hate it for what it stands for...whatever that is..but the bottom line is they hate it


classic beach road!
 
 
I however do not hate ice plant..as a matter of fact, I love it! I love it even though as we speak, the idiots over on the Channel Islands are ripping it out because it is deemed non-native...

ok so there's nothing I can do about that..legally..I mean I can't just go kill a bunch of people because I disagree with them, can I? damn laws!!!

 
so I see there was a fire in Summerland Saturday night...some peeps had a bonfire going and were shooting fireworks off according to the reports....

so the reason this story interested me was because of the native plant restoration done by the county sub-contractor a few years ago....Channel Islands Restoration was their name..they ripped out ice plant and arundo and planted some nice native plants to hold the hillside together...so a few years go by and I check on the natives now and then and they don't look too bad....or too good..six of one, six of the other

so I go to Summerland beach...supposedly the fire was near Lookout Park..

it's a muggy day and thunder clouds shape off into the distance like a surfer shapes a wave...a few folks are walking their dogs on the beach...the beach never changes...it's a place where the sky touches the water...(ahem)

ok so where's the fire aftermath??? I don't see nuthin...just birds and water and sand...so I walk on down the line and nothing burnt.....so I go back and drive south to around Finney St. and then Wallace Ave where the Summerland sewage plant is...if you want to be an operator here you need to pass a state test that is harder than the state bar, so study up (biology, math and chemistry and of course water science and hydraulics)


 
so I park in a place that's reserved for the Summerland plant employees..a little turn-out..I smell smoke..I noticed the sewage plant smells like blueberry muffins!!

I walk on down the street..hey cool old California beach road..this will be my new hang out... I finally see some burned area by the beach..not an acre, more like a little patch..the fire made a run up the hill but the arundo stopped it!! the mighty arundo was singed but not burned...and this is nowhere near Lookout Park... geez, I want all you reporters to get your facts right...you're an embarrassment to the profession!!


fuck-off prissy celebrities!!
 
I spy some officials down there scoping out the incident..so if you don't want your house to burn down, use ice plant and arundo because the native species will burn like paper!!

then I head over to Loon Point and see some new surveillance cameras at the Padaro Lane entrance..WTF??? ever since the Hollywood celebs bought 20+ million dollar properties here a few years ago, they have littered Padaro Lane with these signs and now some cameras!! paranoid much?? Kevin Costner, are you responsible for this? George Lucas? Rob Lowe...what a bunch of sissies!!

well I got out of my truck, walked up to the camera and flipped it off...flipped off all those self-serving self-important celebrities...you fucks crap just like everyone else so don't get too uppity with me..

the surveillance signs and cameras are a passive-aggressive way by these movie people to tell you to keep out of their neighborhood...Padaro Lane is a public road and I'm outraged at this special treatment for these papperazzi magnets!

well here's something they should really be afraid of: ME!!! YOU ARE NOW ON MY RADAR!! UNDER MY SURVEILLANCE!! YOU GOT THAT YOU FANCY  PADARO LANE PET SHOP BOYS??? I WILL TAKE BACK PADARO LANE FOR THE PEOPLE!!!

Monday, July 22, 2013

Pearl Necklace

she wore a pearl necklace.....

ok so some dude named Marc emails me awhile ago and asks if he can use a picture of Kym Herrin I had in my post "she talks to angels"..

 
he said he's doing a story on pretty girls in videos from the fun age of rock n roll and 1980s MTV....

he said he's doing a feature on Kym Herrin...he was able to go out and get Kym to spill her guts, to agree to a feature story...who is this dude? Hugh Hefner?? Marquis De Sade?? well, he calls himself an author of books for all ages, speaker, and pop culture archeologist...


of course, Kym used to be a Playboy model and boy oh boy was I surprised when I found out she was living on the Young Ranch (June Young practically invented Santa Claus Lane and the Big Yellow House) in Carp when I was renting a little funky place up there in the 1990s....I'd sit out in the yard reading Fritz Perls Gestalt therapy and water science books on my days off...

I gave Kym a ride one morning to Kim's Market and, well, she was a real fine girl, a real nice babe and I was the perfect gentleman...helping a neighbor out..she was dating the ranch owner's son at the time...

I chanced to see Kym again at the Court House last year, took her picture and the guy who emailed me has a blog called Noblemania, and wanted to use that picture...so I said "sure" and say "hi" to Kym for me..

http://noblemania.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-girl-in-video-legs-1984-part-2-of-3.html
 

so the dude emails me back yesterday and said he didn't need the picture after all because Kym provided a better one, and indeed she did!

the guy, Marc Tyler Nobleman interviewed Kym and it is a fabulous read...

some awesome stories and pictures of a really fun time in pop culture..and Kym Herrin was a big part of it...

the Young Ranch had quite a rock-n-roll history with Kym up there..she was friends with ZZ Top, the Doobies bros Tom Johnson was up there at one time.. it was a little artist enclave held together by master mechanic/farmer John Young and the big tough wonderful colorful JuneYoung...

check it out.. the rockin' Kym Herrin interview by Marc Tyler Nobleman...

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Indiana wants me

Lord I can't go back there...I wish I had you to talk to
If a man ever needed dying, he did... No one had a right to say, what he said about you...And it's so cold and lonely here without you Out there, the law is coming, I've been so tired of running

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8Hnnj3VW5w


well I do remember when the Harley shop moved in by Santa Claus Lane...they hung a huge American flag on the pole and a bunch of cool motorcycles were suddenly part of the neighborhood...I didn't mind too much...Harley noise is better than those horrible rice-burner bikes ....weeeeeeee.weeeeee...I like a nice Harley rumble now and then...RRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRR....

but things got a bit weird at the dealership because it was run by rightwing Christians with names like Jedediah...biblical stuff...and then they started having faux-charity pro-war events and once Dr. Laura was a special guest...then a big fat bald guy from the Harley dealership in a Ford F150 followed me around the hills on my bike...he'd come up beside me, slow down and axe why I was taking pictures..I told him to fuck off you idiot teabagger!! then I went to 7/11 and saw a cop there and filed a report on big fat bald Harley dude...

well, all this didn't sit well with me.. I saw thru their scams immediately and eventually ran them all out of town



I remember a few events  to help veterans organizations..like Operation Family Fund...and Wounded Warriors..both advertised heavily on FOX NEWS..Operation Family Fund was supported by Dr. Laura and turned out to be a fraud with off-shoots giving gifts and money to friends and family...

Wounded Warriors is heavily supported by Bill O'Reilly and FOX so I know it was a sham...

and lo and behold, I find out some veterans in Indiana are not too happy with the Wounded Warriors Project for shocking reasons..ie they don't help vets!!!

Veteran Dean Graham has a few words to say about Wounded Warriors:


WOUNDED WARRIORS IS A FRAUD!! 

http://www.helpindianavets.com/wounded-warriors-is-a-fraud/

"We have personally investigated Wounded Warriors and what we have learned is very disturbing.

They advertise heavily on T.V. and if you pay close attention they do not show one actual thing they have done to help a Wounded Warrior.

They show pictures and stories of Wounded Warriors and use them as a heart tugging way to solicit donations.

They have paid a famous country music singer Trace Adkins to further play on peoples emotions.

I urge everyone to call Wounded Warriors and ask them what they do for Veterans?

I urge you to ask them if they can help a wounded warrior keep their lights on today? I know they will not be able to because they do not give financial asistance to wounded warriors. WHY?


THIS IS WHY GRANTS SHOULD COME DIRECTLY TO THE VETERANS AND NOT NON-PROFITS THAT MAKE CHOICES FOR THE VETERANS.

Millions of dollars have been wasted in the name of Veterans through non profits."

I love you Indiana!! and will help you expose the Wounded Warriors non-profit scammers...IRS take note!!

Saturday, July 20, 2013

time is on my side

yes it is

gee, I missed Ted Nugent at the Chumash Casino! he was there to parody himself and did a great job I'm told...

while Preacher Andy Caldwell of the Church of COLAB wants to spend taxpayer green on an investigation into his theory about EnviroGate, which involves every liberal and enviro in Santa Barbara County, I want an investigation by UCSB into Lanny Ebenstein's pot house issues and why the hell he is allowed to teach at UCSB...I'm serious..the investigation starts right ...NOW!

first, Andy Caldwell has been hurling accusations against the liberals on the BOS for twenty years, so why stop now? well actually that's his job to try and link the supes to some illegal activity...but has Preacher Andy forgotten the bible? thou shalt not bear false witness..it means you should not lie (tell an untruth) in such a way that it will hurt someone else....
now the reason I started this blog was Wendy kept bearing false witness against public workers..public workers who are too busy working and raising families to deal with her absurd behavior..but me? I got plenty of time on my hand...time is on my side, so Team Wendy, I'll always have time for ya!!


so Andy is playing pin the tail on the donkey, trying to pin the liberal supes to some non-existant scandal..well what he's really doing is trying to protect pal and ex-superviosr conservative Joni Gray who was busted and disgraced for sticking her hands in the non-profit cookie jar in Lompoc!! I haven't heard a peep from Pastor Andy about Joni....hmmmm


is Lanny high??

 
then, the News-Press keeps trying to prop up Lanny Ebenstein as some financial genuis and Wendy refused to do a story about his legal problems in Eureka..the pot house, the foreclosures, the etcs..and now we have Lanny speaking to 40 kids about Ronald Reagan at the Young Miss America Foundation lunch, Wendy's personal non-profit...there is just so much hideous posturing here that I must protest! these poor kids are being brainwashed by Team Wendy...why doesn't Wendy invite Ron Reagan, the real son, to speak??

and look at Lanny's eyes..is he on qualudes?? pot? his pupils are constricted and/or dilated!! he looks high!! he looks weird, he looks spooked!! he looks like member of Team Wendy!!

or Eddie Munster on dope!! hahahaha!

Friday, July 19, 2013

back in the saddle

I'm back / I'm back in the saddle again / I'm back / I'm back in the saddle again / Ridin' into town alone / By the light of the moon / I'm looking for ole' Sukie Jones

now I don't want to beat a dead horse, but if he can't feel anything, what's the harm? WHAAACK!!!

it looks like the gov't has launched an attack against DUI lawyer Darryl Genis and Darryl, a lawyer himself, has had to "lawyer-up" with another lawyer for defense...why can't Darryl defend himself after all he is a lawyer as I just noted...


what..me worry?
so it's a conspiracy of District Attorneys and their gov't pals all ganging up on Darryl Genis because he is so darn effective in court..winning all those DUI cases..well two that I remember anyway...but the gubmint unions are all circling the wagons to keep Darryl at bay...they fear him! they loathe him!! and now he must answer to the California State Bar...bar? you mean like Bo Henry's cocktail lounge??

no I'm talking about the California State Bar, which is a professional organization: Created by the state legislature in 1927, the State Bar is a public corporation within the judicial branch of government, serving as an arm of the California Supreme Court. All State Bar members are officers of the court.

Membership in The State Bar of California affords attorneys the right and privilege of practicing law in this state. The bar's integrated network of functions and services — many of them mandated by law — protects the public and assists attorneys in meeting their professional obligations.

ok so sometimes professionals need to pass tests and join organizations that further their standings and careers...sometimes they get kicked out of their pro-organizations for ethics issues like the "handwriting expert" James Blanco who was used by Lance and Genis and thoroughly discredited at the Lance DUI hearings a few years ago...


and now Darryl seems to have some ethical issues that he must answer to the bar for...of course Darryl and his lawyers will argue a conspiracy against him, the trumped up charges because the DA is out to get him, and other such paranoid delusions, but has Darryl done anything professionally unethical?

has Darryl shirked his professional obligations? of course he has....if Darryl loses his privilege to practive law, what will all the drunk drivers do?? who will take his place defending your right to drive drunk?? who will make up stories about gov't employees and get them printed in the News-Press?? hey why don't newspapers have professional organizations they answer to?

but who will replace the irreplaceable Mr. Genis? Barry Capello??

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Bottle of Wine

fruit of the vine, when you gonna let me get sober...

well, I guess I gotta cover all these Wine Festivals now...and Beer Festivals... and Tequila Festivals..hey I thought you guys in Santa Barbara just had a wine festival up at the Museum of Natural History where someone got drunk and cut hisself with a wine glass who got real bloodied up

spits..or swallows??

 
and now I see the California Wine Festival is happening from July 18 to July 20...let's see about this one, ok? if I go....ooops I'll have to miss Thursday but if I had gone I would've been at the Casa De La Guerra Courtyard...the event lasts from 6:30PM to 9:00PM...Casa De La Guerra...isn't that one of Wendy's properties? no but she owns a little building on the corner plus the News-Press and she thinks she owns City Hall but boy is she wrong about that..she owns Frank and Dale maybe..

 
but anyway WINE!!! so this festival starts at the Casa de la Guerra historic building..how nice to have a bunch of winos hanging out here watching dancers, listening to music and eating cheeze...for 2.5 hours?? what kind of a festival is this? oh I guess if people get too many glasses of wine in them it could be a problem on the streets so they limit the fun to 2.5 hours...plus it's pretty close to the Police Station...

ok so Day 2 of the Wine Fest from 5 to 6 PM should find me at Fess Parker's attending a Cabernet Clinic...a what??? a Cabernet Clinic where I can taste some Cabs and meet the folks who made them..how exciting!!

then from 6:30 to 9 PM, I can stumble on over to the Carousel at Chase Palm Park for Champagne Reception...a what? A Champagne Reception! oh...uh...I drink champagne and ride around on the carousel... and fall off , and blame the cops and sue the city??? COOOOOL!!!

then on July 20th..wow I've been partying a little..a few hours here, a few hours there...but today I will go to the beach at Chase Palm Park from 1-4PM and indulge in 250+ wine and craft beers...Gourmet bites and Live Music!! that's two days of non-stop drinking because I buy about 30 bottles of wine and champagne..am I supposed to drink them all at once to get into the festival vibe?? do I have enough beer?? so sorry, I meant to say Craft Beer!


am I cool enough for this..or sophisticated enough? is my palate in the right place??

oh shit, leave me alone, let me go home, let me go home and start over!!

What'd I Say

tell your mama, tell your pa, I'm gonna send you back to Arkansas..you don't do right

GEEZ! either I'm getting smarter or drunk drivers are getting dumber! so the latest drunk driver mayhem was caused by two Isla Vista beaners who drove their car in the wee hours and crashed by El Sueno Rd exit..apparently this is a favorite hang-out of drunk drivers..

so these two tacos crash their car, get out, leave it in the middle of the road with no lights..go off and sit by the side of the highway..and wait for other motorists to crash into it... their car, sitting in the middle of the highway, with no lights and no warning

I was driving home one night from work at about 1:00 am and suddenly I saw a car in the right lane of 101..no lights...just sitting there..I didn't see it until the last few seconds but luckily I was in the fast lane...but the thing is you can't see a parked car in the middle of the highway at night!! dumb!!!

so the two wetbacks caused some injuries and I say send them back to Mexico or Arkansas and have the southerners deal with them....

there is nothing worse than a drunk Mexican...except a drunk American! :)

so two other drunk drivers are slowly making their way thru the legal system: Martin Maguire..still stuck in preliminary limbo...the next hearing will be 8/20/13..and Jason Hunter seems to have disappeared off my radar..maybe he's still in the hospital.

and I just noticed that George Zimmerman, the cracker who killed that black kid in Florida looks a lot like that DUI enabler/lawyer cracker Darryl Genis...

the gene pool is irreversibly corrupted!

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

slightly stoopid

Won't someone please help us here
I hear it's getting worse every year, and one solution is beer
But you don't mix beer and vodka lightly
We mix professionally



you know just once I'd like to hear Wendy say "okay, Mick, you win...here's thirty dollars"...just once...

 
but I'm a little worried ..not too worried but I haven't seen Nipper or Wendy out and about lately..I know they are there, but I haven't seen them..they are like rats in the attic! you know they are there, but you can't see them...

oh wait... I see Nipper is now President of an outfit called American Travel Media Corporation...well congratulations on that ..wait a minute..I took a closer look and it says Nipper is really a female! He's a She!! so Nipper is a tranny??? what does that make Wendy? a lesbo?? so I think Wendy and Harriet Miller were lovers! remember Harriet the old biddy lesbo mayor who looked like she sucked lemons for a living...and she lost five million tax payer dollars in an Orange County investment scheme while she was mayor..these people are pretty fruity

it's all starting to make sense to me now...

then I see the Mr. Wimpy show...no, Mr. Shrimpy wasn't his guest but motormouth Peter Lance and DUI protector Darryl Genis were on....first Lance was talking like he was high on speed or cocaine about his dumb book then they started wanking on SBPD cop Kasi Beutel and Chief Sanchez again...rehashing all the old stuff in the Peter Lance DUI hearings two years ago...

of course they lied when they said Judge Brian Hill quickly threw the case out because he wanted to protect the cops...that's nonsense.. I was there and the hearing lasted months!!

the case was dismissed at the end only after the last ditch attempt by Genis and Lance to suppress evidence...Hill fell for it and said the cops violated search and seizure rights..and that people should be able to stop at a green light for up to 30 seconds on a New Year's Eve before a cop could pull them over!!! it was a bullshit hearing and Brian Hill was in way over his head..Lance would have gotten creamed in a court case with a jury and that's why his lawyer Genis kept filing motions to dismiss!!

slightly very stoopid!
 
then Lance starts screaming at the camera challenging the cops and City of Santa Barbara to open up all their personel files so he can prove all his fictional conspiracy theories... and he wants all the cops to take lie detector tests!! the dude is nuts!!!

then.. Lance and Genis started talking to an obviously hung-over Mr. Wimpy about the Tony DeNunzio case..Darryl, who had been sitting there like a bump on a log while Lance was fervently trying to prove all his own conspiracy theories, finally speaks and comes up with some weird plot against Tony DeNunzio..it was unbelieveable!!.. Darryl thinks-he really thinks this-that the cops were trying to set up Tony because Tony's a "lady's man"...and someone called Officer Tudor who according to Daryll is also a lady's man to come out to the Boathouse and rough up DeNunzio...all this under the watchful eye of the police dash cam !!

Darryl says the camera was part of a pilot program and when Officer Tudor started following Denunzio, he couldn't find Tony driving erratically, so he pulled him over in the Gelson's parking lot....and beat him up!!! WTF??

you mean it was of no concern that Tony DeNunzio was driving drunk on a suspended license for a previous DUI..or that he was convicted of beating up his girlfriend's son?? are those facts lost on Mr. Wimpy, Lance and Genis???

these guys always prove one thing: defending drunk drivers is pretty stoopid!!

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

everybody knows this is nowhere

I think I'd like to go.. back home...and take it easy...

like I said, after the French Festival I went downtown to check out Granada Books and pick up a few magazines like Bitch or Utne Reader...maybe Vintage Guitar mag....I could get these and more at Borders..but Borders in now a place for little girls to buy their first pair of panties..hmmmm

everybody knows, everybody knows
 
well I did notice that State Street by the Granada has gotten a little weird looking..like a model street empty but for a few mannequins...it just looks odd...like it's staged...just bars and girlie clothing stores

then you get relief when you pass over to the Central Library...and I saw some scruffy looking dudes at the corner of State & A...this famous corner has hosted many characters....petitions get signed here, babies are born here...it's the heart and soul Center of Santa Barbara...

nowhere


so the conservatives are trying to get rid of the homeless, and I'm trying to get rid of drunk drivers...drunk drivers do alot more damage than the homeless but since the homeless look poor, they pose a bigger threat to the business community...it's all about money..or is it...a homeless person has never stopped me from buying something...but a drunk driver could shear off my legs at any given moment.. I will not rest until the drunks are off the streets!!! but it's gonna be hard because Santa Barbara has a drinking problem..oh everybody knows but it's never on a city council agenda..the homeless are on the agenda alot, but not the big Santa Barbara drinking problem...and all the bars and tasting rooms!! Real Change not Spare Change?? it's a hollow slogan shouted at the moon by the elistist drunks in Santa Barbara..and of course it means nothing...


Granada Books..nada!!
 
ok so I went to see MR. DUI Peter Lance at his book signing inside Granada Books but no one was there..an empty chair...some lonely echoes from the wood floors...will Chaucer's stoop so low as to hold a Peter Lance book signing non-event...I know Borders wouldn't...Barnes and Noble wouldn't....

well maybe Pete will return to the News-Press and they'll print his book....

everybody seems to wonder, what it's like down here...gotta get away from this day to day running around, everybody knows this is nowhere...

Sunday, July 14, 2013

lost dogs and mixed blessings

I'm walking down the street feeling like Lucky Larue...


all's well and Sunday is the last day of the French Festival...a celebration of French Independence...why don't they have a 4th of July Festival at Oak Park next year...Americans need to learn to have some fun...so I arrived and it's crowded and a nice bit of music is being played on stage...an old rag time French band! I sat myself down and took a look around and wow there's lots of girls here today and they are showing more skin than Saturday because it's hotter...and that's what I concentrated on...aside from all the other fun stuff!! they sold beer wine and champagne at a little stand..

but the vibe at this festival is fun not booze..now that's a breath of fresh air!!


 
man oh man...
these French femmes are redoutable!!

so I buy a hat and walk around and hey there's ol' Robert Eringer...boy the dude is short and  shrimpy! We know Mr. Wimpy well meet Mr. Shrimpy..he was there with his lovely young daughter so I didn't say anything....howdy Mr. Shrimpy!! bonjour!!!

Eringer..Mr. Shrimpy!!

so speaking of poor guys, I drank in the last bit of festival for me this year and headed  downtown..State Street to check out Granada Books..the Montecito Journal said Peter Lance be here to sign his new book...well there's the weird display in the front window...it's ugly and would steer people away from the store! and it appears it did because no one was in there....Granada Books sucks..it's small and dumpy looking and I couldn't find any magazines!!

oh how I miss Borders!





 
I think Santa Barbara is on to Peter Lance and his stable of bullshit promoters like the News-Press and Montecito Journal...Lance is a hack

and if he had any sense, he'd be selling his books at the French Festival ....but he probably doesn't even know it's going on....these Team Wendy guys...I think they're soft in the head!!

as the French say: ce chien reste au-dehors de la maison...

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Parlez-Moi d'Amour

Mon Dieu et Sacre Bleu!!

ok so I went to the French Festival to get away from certain Americans for awhile...get away from bad juju...just get away from the je ne sais quoi...the lowlife, yes the sweet lowlife..just for awhile...but one thing about America, you always miss her if she's gone too long...


Jessica Fichot and band

 maybe I'll get back to France before too long...but since I'm here, the French Festival is the next best thing to Paris in the the Spring... I get there at 10:30 am while they are settting things up...I walk by the hospital...big and white like a sanitarium....I like to walk by the bungalows and peek in the bathroom windows..


 
then sit under the oaks and relax..take in the atmosphere and it's always so good....the berets, the poodles, the baguettes for 2 bucks each! the cafe au lait...and the girls.....ooooh la la...


it's cloudy and cool in Carp but it's sunny and warm at Oak Park and as I sit down, the trees are dropping things on my head...

quelle chance!!

I see a familiar face warming up on stage with her band-a stand -up bass player and a guitarist- on the Eiffel Tower stage I think the MC called it..it's Jessica Fichot..a favorite of the French Festival she started the festivities with a bang..and nice to see many more people here...Jessica is a wiz on the accordian..she's a lovely young woman....a throwback to the Golden Age of Music and she even passed a basket around for tips...it filled up quick..she was selling CDs after her set and I talked with her for a while..she's very sweet and tough...a tough astute, business woman! and Jessica Fichot is most definately a mystery...


then a group of rather rotund singers took the stage for some fun.... the big girls were kinda cute! I sat next to a big gal... my little French pigeon!!

but I had to split to oui oui...

judging from the looks on peoples' faces, I'm happy to say the French Festival is back in full swing...

there's arts and crafts and food and kids and dogs...I've never seen such joie to vivre!! look at the cute twins!!

a lovely change from the dour faces in Wendy's World..oh just had to mention her for counterpoint because the gals at the French Festival have one thing Wendy will never have: class
so I go home and pass by the beach and see the Chromatic Gate..


 
it looks intense and fantastic!! this gate drives conseravtives crazy because they think the commies built it!! hahah...

and ooooh lala...Vive La France!!