East of Eden

And it occurs to me that evil must constantly respawn, while good, while virtue, is immortal.

well I see that the Botanic Garden has been brainwashing people into the native-only cult and rebranding them as 'citizen scientists"...they will go about the land and preach about the gospel of native plants and the evils of non-native plants..yes it's the old dichotomy of good vs evil...stamp out the devil plants and replace them with biblical plantings....how nice

that led me to see what kinda plants God liked...actually there's lots of non-native plants in the bible and in the Garden of Eden...Adam and Eve...and actually I'm interested in the little thong plant that Eve was wearing...was that native or invasive I wonder?? I think Eve had Cape Ivy covering her booty

most pests are not pests..people in their grand stupidity have labeled millions of things pests and have come up with schemes to get rid of them..they spread poison on the landscapes to get rid of the offensive pest without thinking about the consequences....poisoning the flowers kills bees and other valuable insects....P-O-L-L-I-N-A-T-I-O-N is what they do and they can't pollinate if you poison them

see this bee on a fennel plant? he's a cool bee and should be left alone but he won't be left alone...pretty soon some jerks will mow down the fenel for being "invasive"...they will chop it, they will poson it, they will spray it with chemicals to kill it..and all the insects that benefit from the fennel..that's the bad news but the good news is the fennel adjusts and grows back in the spring even stronger....and I always welcome Spring with the wonderful aroma of a sprig of fennel from the roadsides....to think these people are trying to destroy that pisses me off....

any "restoration" of a habitat that destroys an established habitat for other creatures should be a crime...

I had too much to dream last night

I'm not ready to face the light....  

well I guess the DA had too much to dream last night so he called in sick...I however had to show up at 10:00 am in Santa Barbara's Jury Room and wait till Miss Fussybritches told us that we had to come

back on Monday at 9:30 AM because the DA was too ill to make it...

oh ok...I got nothing but time to kill..I got all the time in the world..time means nothing to me now..

 

so while I was waiting I saw some law babes..that's the only reason to be here really is the girls....

I've been spending far too much time in Santa Barbara lately....

she has funny cars

 wanna keena delaega?
jaunaqina dela vega?? wait...do I wanna keen a dela vega????
well do you wanna juana...wait...is is Juanita?? juan a kino dela vega??
wait a minute...do you want to key a Vega??? oh...well no I don't, thank you

and I don't want to key a Clenet either..oh I see Alain Clenet has bought a condo next to Nipper... he paid $500000 while Nippy paid $1.1 million so Alain must've got a fixer at Plaza Desonordoras by the Biltmore...of course Alain is the French dude who builds francey French hearses..I would never drive one...but I do love the French....they gave us socialism, pretty French girls, the dear copper lady, French fries, French kissing and the French Festival...even though the taxes on the rich are high, I approve of taking money from people who get paid more than they deserve...like Gerard Depardieu (French pronunciation: [ʒeˡʁaːʁ dəpaʁˡdjøː] couldn't hack the taxes in France and moved to Russia!

and oh my oh my how will California survive if pro golfer Phil Mickleson leaves the state! Phil is complaining about California's taxes and threatened to move...Phil makes millions chasing a little ball on the grass...another case of over-compensation! Phil Mickleson probably owns a poodle!

golf is a sport for ladies and I like to watch the gals wear them tight little dresses..and they are damn good too...

but I think it's time for me to deal with these one percenters... once and for all

same old story

same old song and dance

technology? Joe can't even master how to drive a car!!!

ok when  I read about Santa Barbara Technology and Industry Association in the News-Press I figured that's the only place I would read about for a few reasons..first of all it's nonprofit, second of all Joe Armendariz is the "executive director"...third of all, the folks who are on the board are also on the boards of the SBCTA and California Center for Public Policy...


hey I wonder if Joe and #69 from the nonprofit Animal Rescue place have rekindled their romance or was it just puppy love..I was gonna try to interview Julia but her Facebook page scared me away...wow..these conservative gals take no prisoners!!

anyway, SBTIA held a dinner at the University Club in SB and gave out some awards...there was a no host bar also..uh oh..you get a bunch of conservatives around no host bar and you know damn well what's gonna happen...but there may be hope in sight..there's a lawmaker in Ireland who came up witha great idea...special permits for drunk drivers!!!

clearly never saw this one coming and neither would other guys playing with a full deck. However, it looks like some people are so in love with alcohol that they're willing to risk large-scale ridicule in their attempts to spread the world about the good things that come with drunk driving. Yes, fellow riders, some wackos in Ireland proposed a law to make driving tipsy legal!

The fantastic law-making idea belongs to Danny Healy-Rae, a councilman in Kerry, southwest Ireland. As Danny declares, it's not necessarily about the booze itself, as these (now dead letter) drunk driving permits would improve the mental health of farmers.

Counselor Danny Healy-Rae suggests that the measure would help with lowering depression and mental illness rates, eventually leading to fewer suicides.

"They're traveling in very minor roads, often on tractors, with very little traffic and it's not right they're being treated the same as the rest of the traveling public and they have never killed anyone.

"The only outlet they have then is to take home a bottle of whiskey and they're falling into depression, and suicide for some of them is the sad way out," Healy-Rae, owner of the Kilgarvan pub in Kerry County, stresses.


ok back to the Santa Barbara Technology and Industry Association which I've never heard of until today..er yesterday...they have about 80 members and have been around since the 1920s??

and they want to promote the free market that they tried to kill with fraud from the likes of Enron and AIG!! hahaha

next they say an emerging market is technology that "tracks personal habits, trends and insights"

now I had to think about that for a minute considering that I'm typing on a computer with gigabytes of stored information on my personal habits, trends and insights...some of course is carefully hidden so's not to embarass anyone and I do mean bare ass..

but seriously....this is just more of these folks hiding behind nonprofits, patting themselves on the back, trying to look important...

but if you track Joe's personal habits and trends well you might ask why they chose him for Executive Director of two overlapping nonprofits...

I don't know..but the world of nonprofits is a strange one indeed...

fakin' it

tangled in the fallen vines, pickin' up the punch lines, I've just been fakin' it...

so I go into downtown Santa Barbara, check out the Film Fest because as you know I got a freekin Jury Duty summons! but this time I spend four hours in Santa Barbara...I see some pretty people then I go into the jury meeting room and wait.... I sit in the back ....way back by the exit in case some mental white guy tries to kill us all in two minutes....bambambam!!!

I wait as 119 other potential jurors file in...119! oh this should be fun..I'm not at all happy about this but
I'm kinda faking it because I'm seeing some pretty women stroll on....let's see if my phony brooding act will attract any attention..ohhh that strawberry blonde babe over there....yea that's the one I want

we're supposed to start at 12:30 pm and at 12:40 pm the clerks roll in..one perky blond chick in the front of the room and two Mexican gals on the sides..the blonde gal was hot but too chirpy and annoying....she tells us to pee if we need to and then she shows a video about the orgasmic joys of jury duty...well I case the joint and spot some pretty fine babes so maybe

then we all had to go up to the front of the room and get our JUROR tags which took about a half hour...we're all standing in line like a bunch of cattle..it's like a movie cattle call for the Film Fest!!
then the clerk babbles on about this and that and says we're finally gonna go upstairs to the court room and the Judge will talk to us...we need to pass through a metal detector..all this takes another 30 minutes...then we go into the court room and it's full so I have to stand and then...oh no holy shit...it's Judge Brian Hill!! I gotta deal with Judge Brian Hill for this trial..I was so pissed I almost jumped over 119 people, the clerk, the lawyers,  the alleged criminals and the bailiffs to scream at Hill "why did you let Peter Lance go free dumbass??"

then Judge Hill explained to us in excruciating lengthy detail and often repeating himself what the trial process would be like...he tells us that this process is called voir dire whereby the court gets to examine potential jurors..he tells us this twice...voir dire is French for to see and to tell or something like that

then he introduced the lawyers and the guys on trial to us.. he says the trial will last about six weeks... knowing Hill it will probably last a year

the two Mexican dudes are accused of murder while being part of a gang..oh, how nice ..two gang-bangers accused of murder..GUILTY!!! why waste time on a trial I say..oh yeah, my tax dollars spent to fill the new jail with more ignorant Mexicans..geez

then Hill says he and the lawyers have some rules: Rule #1-don't read the News-Press..he says we can't read the front page because the News-Press doesn't always have the facts right...everyone laughs..then he tells us not to read the Independent or watch KEYT..this is all so we can be fair to the defendants...this is bullshit...does Judge Hill think the jurors are too stupid to distinguish when the News-Press is lying??? the News-Press is lying ALL THE TIME so why can't I read it...then he says don't go on the internet..Rule #2- don't talk to anyone about the trial....what am I supposed to do....go live in a teepee??

then he says those with medical hardships should stay to explain their issues and the rest of us should go and we'll complete the orientation and questioning on Thursday when Judge Hill wants to see if anyone has any biases that might interfere with a fair trial...

well..yeah Judge Hill, I got some and I'll explain it all to you on Thursday...

the Treasure of Sierra Madre

I yam what I yam

 

 

well while Santa Barbara is worshipping second rate actors at the Film Festival I have a job to do today....I have to go to into Santa Barbara and see if I get to be a juror....I got a number and I got a badge number...'scuse me Judge? what's my badge number? badge number? badges? I don't have to show you no stinkin' badges!!!

then this morning as I was fumbling for some fake sugar for my coffee, I noticed that Popeye and Olive Oil were in the cupboard together!!

now these are the real American icons..real actors...Popeye and Olive Oil!

these other guys like skinny Daniel Day Lewis and pretty boy Ben Affleck appear to need a few cans of spinach...

the Three Bells

Then the little congregation Prayed for guidance from above "Lead us not into temptation Bless this hour of meditation Guide him with eternal love"

ok there was a story in the News-Press about some lady who ran a modeling agency in town and she and her lawyer husband got an award from that Father Virgil guy....or the award was named after Virge...but it seemed like a crock to me so I didn't pay it too much mind..but I do keep seeing these things come up about pedophile priests and their pals in the clergy who helped them abuse children..

O Lord, I am not worthy that Thou shouldst come to me; but speak the word of comfort, my spirit healed shall be. And humbly I'll receive Thee, the Bridegroom of my soul, no more by sin to grieve Thee, or fly Thy sweet control. Amen!

translation: don't tell anyone or I'll get into trouble

if you put me in a boat with the Devil and a Catholic priest, I'd prefer to be with the Devil...I'm not saying Father Virg was a perv or anything, but I see another story that a fey dude named Bishop Thomas Curry was helping to shield pedo-priests instead of turning them in or killing them, which is what I would do if I could....

what's up with the naked kids, Virg?

so did Curry and Father Virg run in the same circles...Well there's a few clues first of all Father Virgil put out a religious CD and one of the glowing reviews was by Bishop Curry....hmmmm..and what's with the naked kids on the cover??

then I see that in 2001 Charles Schwab the investor guy gave a million dollars to UCSB for it Catholic Studies program:

Schwab Gives $1 Million for Catholic Studies at UCSB...back when Fathe Virgil was alive

September 21, 2001

(Santa Barbara, CA) – Charles R. Schwab, founder and chairman of Charles Schwab & Co., Inc., has pledged $1 million to support Catholic Studies at the University of California, Santa Barbara.

His leadership gift and those of other donors have established the Virgil Cordano Endowment in Catholic Studies in UCSB's Department of Religious Studies. The endowment honors Father Cordano, a Franciscan Friar and pastor of the St. Barbara Parish at the Santa Barbara Mission who has devoted his life to promoting greater understanding of all religions and increased dialogue among them.

Bishop Thomas J. Curry of the Santa Barbara Pastoral Region called the Schwab gift "an extraordinary act of generosity. This donation will help establish an important legacy and will also inspire others to support what will become a major center for the study of the Catholic tradition."

Father Cordano said he was touched that the endowment has been named in his honor and expressed great enthusiasm for the new Catholic Studies program. "The program's aim will be to foster exploration of the historical, cultural, and sociological backgrounds of Catholicism in order to promote mutual understanding among people of different beliefs and cultures," he said.

and there's that Bishop Tom Curry again, chiming in....so they must have been pals....Father Virgil must've known something, doncha think??

these old religious guys are pretty creepy