Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Great Speckled Bird

What a beautiful thought I am thinking
Concerning the great speckled bird....

so I get a NO on P (NOPE) letter in the mail...I don't know about you, but I like a good P and Sarah Silverman likes P, too....that's one nice looking Jewish gal!! pretty and funny but I wonder how Jewish can she really be??

and Jewish they even make those??? all I know is Sarah's got nice tits..the kinda tits that could make a man cry

anyway the No on P (NOPE) survey had a bunch of dumb questions and crazy answer choices like Strongly YES, Somewhat YES, Somewhat NO, Strongly NO....I am somewhat PEE-ODE reading these silly surveys and strongly opposed to this junk mail....what a waste of postage

oh so I see Fess Parker's Doubletree Inn was busted for poisoning birds...Fess was a bad actor turned businessman and Injun-lover...the pigeons and sparrows I guess were the I hate pigeons as much as I hate gays and Jews, but poisoning them is a rather ghastly solution...(the birds)... a Hitler remedy altho they did that on the Channel Islands and eeryone was pleased and happy with Fess's crime seems pretty minor in comparison but putting poison in bird feeders as is claimed is just beyond belief...and HYDREX was the hired gun!!

you can keep sparrows away if they bother you with those little lace doily things on the window eves

HYDREX!!! dumbass moron on the TV commercials..oh, they kill bees, too

white people are hard to figure out sometimes....

Doubletree Bird Refuge

I've seen poisoned pigeons  and it's not a pretty sight...they get lethargic, can't fly..then they bloat up and lie down till they die..occasionally the poison wears off and they can fly away but mostly they die a staggering death....and then you gotta clean up the mess..

I go into town to check out the Doubletree..then a walk on the beach and I see another issue "Beach Wracking" ain't fracking and it ain't whacking so what is it??? I don't know

when I was in Venice, Italy I saw tons of pigeons and they didn't bother me nearly as much as the Italians, but I guess Italian pigeons are cooler than American ones....

so the point of all this is poisoning things to get results..ok I spray a little RAID to kill ants now and then, but a larger scale operation is out of the question...putting poison in bird feeders outside is just stupid...I've seen birds of prey rip apart pigeons and that's the solution, not poisoning them..that poison ends up in the food chain one way or another....

so my advice to the late Fess and his merry prankster bird killers is to HARVEST the sparrows and pigeons..and put them on the menu....

ever hear of sparrow-stuffed squab??? it's to die for!

Monday, August 25, 2014

Water of Love

deep in the ground, but there ain't no water here to be found

back during the local elections, I went up to Lake Casitas in Ojai to check out the bald eagles...I was amazed at not only the eagles, but also the low level of the lake...I returned and warned the people and candidates to talk about solutions... instead they were worried about gay people getting married and how much public workers were getting paid....and unions...all red meat nonsense to satify some retarded conservative base...

now while I agree gay people can be gross and totally creepy, I don't think we should spend an ounce of energy denying them civil rights....and I don't think it's prudent to try and bust unions....the tax association in Ventura wasted lots of time trying to penalize public workers with a bogus initiative but the judge tossed the case out....

but both conservatives and liberals are to blame..the libs are trying to save steelhead trout in a drought....if you think about that for even a second you'll see they are delusional...I say fuck the trout, I got a pool to fill!!

there's talk of desal in Santa Barbara....put the old plant on line and see what happens..back during the other big drought, voters opted for both state water and desal..the desal plant ran for a week or so and was taken off line....some units were dismantled or sold off and the skeleton put it back together will be expensive..

I read there was an early wine grape harvest....but picking wine grapes is not really a harvest because making wine is a non-essential commodity to be grown locally....

and breweries...24 gallons of water to get a pint of beer..then it gets pissed out using more water to flush!! legalize pot and save water!! i'm down with that

water is the most important resource esp in California... can't keep building out and ignoring the water supply...

the irony is people want to drill locally for more oil but we may have to import water soon

Sunday, August 24, 2014

laugh laugh

I thought I'd die, it seemed so funny to me

"When I write and speak, I certainly do use vivid language, but one thing I don't do is risk my integrity by engaging in irresponsible, inflammatory rhetoric in order to bolster a weak argument. I believe the best course of action is to base my positions on reasons and facts, and challenge anybody who disagrees to have an honest debate anytime, anywhere. In that regard, a letter writer recently put words in my mouth in order to bolster his argument. I wish this was an isolated instance, but unfortunately....."

no I dint write that, News-Press Guest writer and Professional Liar Andy Caldwell did and I laughed at the words "risk my integrity"...geez Andy, buffoons don't have any integrity!!

Andy is mad at the Measure P folks..and BTW, Andy already offered to debate them, they accepted and Andy chickened chickens have integrity???

see I got no problem with oil..just oil spills

so what else is new? well, I went down to see if the red fox was gone and yep he was..the only thing left was a nice big reddish brown pine cone with some fur on it in the exact place where I pushed the fox to rest..I'm thinking that the turkey vultures may have left that for me as a "thank-you"....I do have a wild streak in me and they sensed that....I am proud to be among the Vulture Brotherhood..the vulture union!!

ants are everywhere and I've never had any problems but lately they have been a bit more aggressive because of the drought..had one crawling on my leg the other day and another tried to crawl up my ass like Andy crawls up Wendy's ass so I clenched my butt cheeks and farted and BAMMM!!!  killed him

the only good ant is a dead ant

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Wild Horses

couldn't drag me away

so we got nativists in helicopters harassing wild horses because the horses compete with native species...this is in Utah..we're talking about 170 horses...they catch them and keep the ones that can't be sold off in corrals...

this is nonsensical...wild horses should be allowed to run wild in the vast public lands of Utah....the horses will live and die but to interfere with them is absurd..they are not harming anything

the National Parks Service and Nature Conservancy used helicopters on the Channel Islands to harass golden eagles and kill deer..oh those terrible golden eagles!! oh those terrible non-native deer!! I think there were some elk, too...ohhh those terrible non-native elk!

well, it appears that the BLM has hired the Yarnbomber dude.... he dresses up in brightly colored yarn and rides around Utah trying to scare wild horses...

some folks think the feral horses are pests that need to be exterminated....these are the nativists/biologists you may have heard me talk about....well piss on them I say...

let the miniscule amount of wild horses that roam free alone...just leave them alone...

how hard is that???

Thursday, August 21, 2014


My fingernails are filthy, I've got beach tar on my feet. And I miss my clean white linen and my fancy French cologne

just what the world needs: another fucking nonprofit

so I'm watching the Mr Wimpy Show and he's got two guys on he calls Lanny and Laddy...the first five or ten minutes are spent trying to get the graphics right on the screen...they fumbled and mumbled like they were all high, especially Lanny...Lanny Ebenstein who was fired from writing guest editorial for the News-Press..but poor Lanny still follows Wendy around like dog, showing up at the Reagan Center hoping for a few scraps of meat....poor Lanny

this other guy Laddy..well it seems he was in a skiing accident years ago, tried a reckless manuever and crashed.... and he's pretty messed up so it was hard to understand what he was saying...but I did get he wants otters to stay up north so they don't interfere with abalone fishing in the southland....and he's pro-oil..both Laddy and Lanny are pro-oil....and that means more oil development because as they said it's good for the environment and the economy...

Lanny says he remembers when before the 1969 oil spill, he used to walk on the beach in Santa Barbara and get tar on his feet and the Chumash used this tar to make boats..and there's natural seeps so it's all good

well they finally got the graphics up for Laddy's resume and he's part of a nonprofit called SOS...STOP OIL SEEPS...stop the seeps by drilling more I think is the logic..the nonprotfir was founded by Lad and a guy named Bruce Allen who has since died...

so I think these guys are trying to sell me this..that seeps and spills are the same so we can't blame oil companies like BP when they fuck up!

then I do some online searches and see this:
Last September 15, during the "drill baby drill" brouhaha over offshore oil drilling, a Fox News broadcaster named Trace Gallagher declared on national television that "more oil seeps through the ground off the coast of California than is ever spilled out there."

According to Ira Leifer, who runs an institute at UC Santa Barbara called Bubbleology that publishes scientific studies on the seeps, this is partly true, but only if you ignore the element of time.

"The Coal Oil Point seeps produce the equivalent of one Exxon Valdez every three years," he said. "But there’s a vast difference between drinking a glass of vodka every night and drinking a year’s worth of vodka in one night."
The infamous 1969 oil disaster at Platform A off the Santa Barbara coast released about 100,000 barrels of oil — roughly 4 million gallons — in just 12 days. The oil came ashore in a thick layer along our central coast, fouling beaches from Rincon Point to Goleta, and killing seals, birds, otters, whales and other forms of sea life by the thousands

Summerland oil...5-30 wt..I use it in my truck!
some folks are still claiming the 1969 spill was "natural"

Marines and Mammals

I know the Marine Mammal Center was founded by News-Press columnist Peter Howorth and he is affiliated with a guy named Lad Handelman...Laddy!!!! well Lad had an opinion on EDHAT about fracking...about Measure P which is causing fits among nearly everybody..way to go girls... you Water Guardian girls are all uppity and soft and purty and those fat ignorant bitches up north don't take kindly to you....hehehe

but ah...hmmm..oh yeah, this Lad dude and Howorth also have a business: the Marine Mammal Consulting Group..the resume is padded and these guts are responsible for saving every creature in the sea while the oil companies drill offshore..I guess the oil companies hire Lad and Howorth to protect the seals and sea lions from the oil workers! or something

The following outlines several highly visible, extremely sensitive
projects MMCG has recently completed off the California Coast.

1994: U.S. Navy ship shock trials of Aegis class destroyer USS John Paul Jones.
To test the integrity of each new class of vessel and its systems, the U.S. Navy detonated 10,000-pound explosive charges at progressively closer distances to the ship to simulate a near miss. This also taught sailors how to respond under such circumstances, thus ensuring the safety of our military personnel. The project budget was over $1 million a day.

MMCG was tasked to establish and maintain a moving four-by-eight-mile safety zone for wildlife 200 miles off the California coast as the destroyer moved through the test area. MMCG’s approach was so successful that it has been applied toward the ship shock tests of the USS Seawolf, a new class of submarine. These tests took place off the east coast.

and somehow when the oil facility needs repair by the Carp Bluff, Peter and his crew mitigate problems with the sea life.and the seals...although they don't say how..

Served as a mitigation consultant for oil companies. He helped design and implement the mitigation strategy for Exxon's Las Flores and Santa Ynez Project northwest of Santa Barbara, a $5 billion operation spanning several years. Howorth also was involved in pipeline and pier repairs conducted by Chevron and Venoco that extended through a harbor seal rookery in Carpinteria. These projects, spanning several weeks each, were carried out with no significant impacts and no complaints even though the site was within 20 yards of a bluff occupied by an environmental group that watched each project, plus allowed immediate access to the media.

maybe Peter and Lad gave the seals little ear plugs to quiet the noise??? and I've never seen MMCG working in Carp....these consultants and nonprofits...these potheads and drunks trying to explain oil and environmentalism...hmmmmm

it all sounds very fishy to me..

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Carry On

one morning I woke up

so I told you about the Red Fox and that the Turkey Vultures would be down soon to dispose of the little fox kit...I've been watching the vultures glide and swoop down from the hills for years and am always amazed at their rid the landscape of carrion...always there to do the job...I see three perched atop a power pole, sometimes fighting for a spot...the pole is close to the fox, so I know the vultures are planning....ooooh, I see Carrion Crow hanging out with a vulture...enough food for everyone... I've never seen that before!! usually the crows are trying to attack the vultures! but they've all come to feast on brer fox....

then the Kite comes back and sits on a branch of a skinny eucalyptus for two hours preening himself...this is bird behavior never seen before except here on these pages....the Audubon Society will call and offer me an honory bird watching degree and I will decline and tell them to go jump in a lake..or a marsh hahahaaah!!

seriously, three vultures on a power pole; a crow and a vulture sitting in harmony on the pole; and a Kite preening for two's unprecedented

crow hangs with vulture!

but I started to think about territory and what a crime it is to build houses and vineyards where they shouldn't be..the City of Carp saved the Salt Marsh and to the council that made that happen, I will be forever grateful...

but anyway here's a primer on territories in case you get and your dog

your territory: front country with houses and condos and grocery stores

turkey vulture territory: power poles, telephone poles and anywhere the remains of death lie below

mountain lion territory: back country and foothills

coyote territory: back country and foothills and creeks

your territory: at Joe' at Macy's

shark territoy: the ocean

your territoy: your boat upon the ocean

sea lion territory: the sea..duh

dolphin territory: Stearn's Wharf fountain

your territory: the sand

your territory: biking down a nice road

plover territoy: Vandenburg Airforce Base and all the beaches up there

kite territory: the sky and the trees and the ground prey..the marsh

ant territory: my kitchen

hummingbird territory: Mexican sage

lady bug territory: fennel

bee territory: all the flowers..ALL THE FLOWERS!!!

bald eagle territory: eucalyptus trees

your territory: a UCSB lab

dog territory: beach, restaurants, banks, doctor's office, post office, grocery store, the lawn, hiking the foothills hiking with their masters and getting lost

red fox territory: the Salt Marsh and foothills

your territory: the toilet

bear territory: back country and trees

my territory: from the Clark Estate to Padaro Lane to the Carp bluffs

I offer this guide to you as a guide to guide you down the road whether you're hiking, biking, wheelchairing, or just out for a walk.....

carry on....

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite

 there will be a show tonight...

a Kite has been hanging out at the Salt Marsh so I went down on Sunday to see if I could see what he's doing..up to his wings in mouse ass, no doubt ...I know a more expensive camera would allow me to catch viewable zoom close-ups, but a new camera is not in the budget right yet...because of the taxman...he wants my money

so I go down there and park and see a dead fox in the the pull-out area on the exit ramp right by the marsh...damn, it's a Red Fox and despite efforts to demonize and remove (kill them) by the crackhead biologists at UCSB, there must still be some foxes here... hoorah!!!

the foxes have been here since the 1870s....
and they are beautiful ..they do no harm to anyone or anything ('cept a rat or mouse)...foxes gotta eat too... and not that gourmet shit people feed their dogs..these little canines are left to their own devices which is why we need to make sure the biolgists who think the foxes don't belong here..we need make sure we shut down these idiot nativists...I'm simply fed up with them...these red foxes are  awesome

ok, so I took some pics and fashioned a large y-shaped stick to move the fox off into the bushes so he wouldn't get squished by a car...the vultures will get him as they should...

he died last night, hit by a can see the blood and his leg is broken...

good-bye B'rer Fox..

so on I went to see if I could see Mr. Kite...nope...but I trust he'll be back tonight..this evening..and I'll take some more bad pictures of him....but he doesn't care..he's got more important things to think about...

for the next few days, I hope Mr. Kite will be topping the bill...and of course Mr. Fox, too