Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Look To Your Soul

for the answer

we men all lose love...girls come and go..I like it when they come but sometimes they go...now some folks blame me that their girlfriends left them but that's a stretch...I am not to blame..I am simply a go-between...look to your soul, for the answer


I hate mulch...it's everywhere supposedly giving nutrients to plants or conditioning soil...and so people gather the mulch in piles and wait..well when you stack the mulch piles high, the organic content decomposes and creates heat..and the mulch piles can get so hot in the center, they combust..so you need to monitor your pile...stick a long thermometer into the center and move the contents around. or aerate..

mulch piles are not like haystacks...you can't find a needle in a haystack but you may find fire in a mulch pile

now the County of SB wants to fancy-up Santa Claus Lane with a lone beach access point with a guard and ICE agent to catch illegals, for "safety"...they say the other access points are illegal..but this is not true..the county built a wooden fence after removing the old rusted spikes in the sand..the fence runs parallel to the tracks and there's at least three or four access points...I've provided a picture

this is a tacit approval of an access point by the County of Santa Barbara to Santa Claus beach...they are encouraging you and me to cross the railroad tracks, go thru the fence opening and enjoy a day at the beach

and that's the way it should be

Sunday, May 1, 2016

Hitchin' A Ride

the sun comes up, a car goes by


ok some weird shit been goin' down...donkey got killed up in Foxen Canyon...that's where the wineries are and people drive like they don't care..they drive up embankments, they drive down ravines, they are just outta control because they are outta the city limits... and I got a whole new set of assholes in my neighborhood and I don't know where they came from so I gotta monitor that too

I've watched the Parallax View many times and I still don't know what it's about..but that's ok..it relaxes me to watch a movie with no plot....it's like my life

so the SB Public Market is fishing for business with a new Beer Garden...what is a beer garden? do they grow beer? do they drink beer until they puke in the flowers?? I'm tellin' you these poeple who come to Santa Barbara from points north and try to set up camp here with businesses that have no meaning, no soul no nothing...they need to stop annoying me with their silly tricks..all you need to do is sell some burgers, chips and beer and business will pick up and so will the drunk driving arrests...

don't overthink this....


now a few days ago some joker was driving on Highway 101 going north and decided to veer off the road, plow through the chain link fence, fly over Via Real and smash into a retaining wall....finally coming to rest in the bushes..the wall being made up of cinder blocks, stopped him dead..

lucky no one was walking on the side walk...cops said they smelled booze on him and I'll check out when the investigation is complete...


of all the things he could have done that day, he decides to drive drunk...what a fucking idiot!

some say the road is littered with dead squirrels who couldn't make a decision, but that's not true...squirrels don't make decisions because they're animals...

but people, even if some of them are dumb as squirrels, can make decisions...

and driving drunk is a bad decision

Saturday, April 30, 2016


blue blue windows behind the stars, yellow moon on the rise

if you put Peter Lance, Nipper, Mr. Wimpy and that Montecito artist chump Thomas Van Mentally-Challenged (keeps painting the same thing over and over!) in a room with Robert Eringer, writer and barfly, I'd say Eringer is the only one with any talent...surrounding himself with dummies is a strategy I've long employed so I look and feel smarter, but for me it doesn't work all the time because ultimately, I'm not as smart as you think I am

but Eringer with all his spy stuff, Princess Grace, the stories, the groovy oratory is either a genuis or a shaman...and Bo Henry's bar of ill-repute? well it just adds to the intrigue

but I did get an email about a rancher in Carpinteria,  ASA ALLEN...never heard of him but Eringer's Surreal Bounce website is investigating Asa's recent death.. was Asa a drunk who grew avocados and pot on his ranch??


it's worth investigating...the ranches behind Carpinteria along Highway 192 have some stories to tell...


I fell in love with Carp after living on Rancho Monte Alegre for a few years...for $600 per month, I had the privilege of living in Olive Carey's old pink bungalow...her ghost was there..she died in that house..and then I moved in...after work, I'd drive home in the wee hours and the yellow moon over the hills was my guiding light

the ranch owners, who were all insane and very colorful and included the Colonel, Maxi, and that nutty Segal woman, told me stories of Olive's cocktail parties with John Wayne and Robert Mitchum....Olive starred in the great old westerns and Wayne and Mitchum did "El Dorado", my fave western...John Wayne, Robert Mitchum, Jame Caan and Edgar Allan Poe...AWESOME!!!

Listed in Forbes as one of the ten best ranches in the USA, Rancho Monte Alegre lost some mojo when it was sold to a developer and Arnold bought a house there..the thought of Arnold and Rob Lowe hanging around Carp gave me a heart murmur

and then there was the Young Ranch...John and June Young...June invented Santa Claus Lane and the Big Yellow House...Playmate Kym Herrin lived up there for awhile with Danny Young...I gave Kym a ride in my truck down to Kim's Market one day..she was just so sweet and nice...Doobie Bros Tom Johnstone lived up there for a spell

Kym Herrin poses for me!!

June Young rented out the cabins to folks and had a great big colorful Christmas Party every year

but the ranches had some secrets..some guns and drugs...the gals would skinny dip in the pond, right next to my cabin....my ramshackle cabin...one night I heard some commotion up the road and Josh and his girl were fighting..Josh had a gun and I went in and got it from him..told him he could get it tomorrow when he sobered up...the old west..we don't call the cops, we take care of things ourselves

the land was beautiful with plenty of wildlife and trees and rolling hills and vulgar Carpinteria farm girls....drugs did some serious damage to some of the folks on the ranches so the beauty of the land and the underlying insanity was very appealing to me ...I just had to live in this area!!

now this Asa guy that Eringer is telling about...his ranch must be next...what's buried there beneath the avocado groves? what secrets are whispered in the wind at night?

the story will unfold because the story must be told..these ranches up here in Carpinteria..the ag must be protected at all costs even if odd Dutch immigrants grow the flowers with illegals helping


but these ranches were just too cool...there's so much history back there...

back there..back there's where you got to go..back there

Friday, April 29, 2016

My Little Corner of the World

Come along with me, To my little corner of the world, And dream a little dream, In my little corner of the world

The News-Press had some front page stories. One was about the San Bernadino terrorists and the sham marriage they had...but since the murderous rage, other Americans have gone on a rage, too...Ohio family murders/executions, two U of VA students kidnapped and killed a 13-year old girl, some dude killed the Han family in Santa Barbara..so do you feel safe in your little corner of the world??

Wendy invited Oliver North, famous for the Iran/Contra affair with Ronald Reagan, to the Ron Reagan Roundtable Luncheon last month..the event sold out (200 people).. I read about this in the Montecito Journal  by some old gal who has a book out called The Magic Makeover: Tricks for Looking Younger, Thinner and More Confident...sounds like something Dr. Laura would write!

but the old gal had nothing but praise for Ollie stating that he rescued 800 students from Grenada, the tiny little island south of the border that Reagan invaded...

Ollie has some ideas about fighting Islamic terror, too

now today the front page of the News-Press had a complaint about Will Ferrel, the SNL actor/comedian...it seems that Will is going to do a film/satire of Ronald Reagan and the Young Miss America Foundation (Wendy's personal non-profit) is mad..the YMAF gals panties are in a bunch....I wouldn't mind examining them panties

but they claim Will will be mocking Reagan's Alz Disease which is nonsense...Reagan was always a confused guy, couldn't speak coherently without a script and the conservatives loved him because of the phony cowboy personna...Reagan was a lousy actor, a mediocre politician, allowed the killing of 200 American troops in Beirut and traded arms for hostages with Iran...with Ollie North as the gopher


fact is the Reagan presidency was smoke and mirrors...like the Young Miss America Foundation, like the News-Press, like Wendy and Nipper...

and the YMAF are acting like Islamic extemists who kill you when you mock Allah...Ronald Reagan is not Allah, girls and boys

but Will, you can use anything in this blog for your movie for a flat fee of $100000...

call me

Sunday, April 24, 2016

When Doves Cry

Dig if you will, the picture Of you and I engaged in a kiss The sweat of your body covers me Can you my darling, can you picture this?

So the Paula Lopez Story makes me cry...when people drink too much booze they do get rambunctious and start doing things maybe they wouldn't ordinarily do..like harass and threaten women, or drive down the highway southbound in the northbound lane! or take swing or kick at a cop...geez Paula you make me feel all weird inside.. but you get some jail time and some counseling...once we become more aware of bad behavior, we can change it..well I can't but I know you can!

the News-Press covered the story on Saturday and said Paula was sentenced in Judge Anderle's Santa Maria courtroom...but Anderle is doling out justice in Santa Barbara, not Santa Maria

Judge Rigali is based in Santa Maria and it appears per the Superior Court calendar Wendy will be going to trial for killing that jogger..well Wendy didn't kill him...actually, Ampersand is being blamed for one of their paper delivery gals running over and killing a jogger in Santa Ynez...Wendy has been shirking her responsibilites forever well maybe now they will hold her accountable

05/09/2016 9:30 AM 1483950 Ampersand Publishing, LLC Rigali, James F SM Dept 2 1) Jury Trial 23-PI/PD/WD Tort - Other - Civil

now I see that SB Schools superintendent David Cash retired recently..never did like the drug-sniffing dog idea in public schools...teach kids about drugs and the dangers in class...and Cash brought alot of baggage from Fresno down to Santa Barbara as well as some weird teacher associates...

but there's a lawsuit involving a David Cash regarding civil rights.......

05/13/2016 8:30 AM 16CV00155 Cash, David Geck, Donna D SB Dept 4 1) Case Management Conference Unlimited Civil Rights (08)

not sure if it's the same guy...or maybe the dogs violated a student's civil rights??

I guess I'll find out sooner or later...probably later

Saturday, April 23, 2016

Keep On Running

Keep on running, keep on hiding / One fine day, I'm gonna be the one / To make you understand / Oh, yeah


I was in Santa Barbara yesterday to get some paint...Dunn-Edwards is a great paint store...being in there is almost therapeutic


I parked on a side street and was struck by the beauty of the mid-town Carrillo area...a cool old building towered over a not-so-cool building, but the shadows cast were of the warm morning sun..I stood there taking it in...I gazed across the street and saw the Arthur Murray Dance Studio...the building however concerned me..it has an Islamic type dome on top indicating probable terrorist activity...then I caught myself in my Islamophobic moment...I felt ashamed

ok so I'm driving down some Santa Barbara road, narrowed from too many parked cars, and I see some women dancing by the Stop Sign...

about twenty gals pass in front of me as I watch.. and wait

this was one fine day

Wednesday, April 20, 2016


got to believe we are magic

hey where's our portion of State Water??? El Nino was a bust, April showers are a joke..what we need is a little magic


I was watching the SB City Council meeting and all the crazies came up during public comment...the City Council is not your mommy so stop crying about things they have no control over!!

wow, these folks who speak are way out there...one dude wears a hat all the time and wants to be mayor in the year 2025...he tried to link the San Bernadino terror attack to the Egyptian style building at the corner of State and Mission...he's got some brain issues or fissures but I think if he wore a mesh hat he'd get some air into that puss-brain!! creepy dude!!

the city council was also talking about another Fess Parker hotel and I thought I heard them say they wanted to change the name of Cabrillo Blvd to Fess Parker Way....I hope I'm wrong but maybe Wendy wants to change State St to Ronald Reagan St?? turn right at Fess Parker Way and head up Ronald Reagan St...ugh!! Santa Barbara must never lose her Spanish influence to rich white conservatives..or Davy Crockett

the good thing about Donald Trump is he's keeping Ted Cruz away from the White House..I don't want another Texas conservative selling God to me every five minutes while picking my pocket!! too many religious cults in America

now I see an ad for the Urban Wine Trail..this is the drunk's version of a recreational hike...but it seems the Carrillo Rec Center was the site of a party to celebrate art and wine..and it's all presented by Mission Linen Supply who keep all the city worker uniforms clean....a bunch of artists (trust funders) showed their pictures and a bunch of wineries had tastings....former City Parks gal Nancy Rapp who looks like she knows her way around bottle of wine is involved as is the City Parks Dept!!

Jill?? are you ok with this.....using the Carrillo Rec Center for wine tastings?? that great old brownstone building normally used for healthy recreation and exercise is being used to ply some well-heeled phonies with more wine than they need?? you need to put your foot down!!

the City of Santa Barbara promoting a wine tasting event...what next, medical marijuana for sale at City Hall?