Monday, May 23, 2016


be thankful I don't take it all

I'm with George on this one...


so I get a letter from the IRS saying they can't process my 2015 tax return...hmmmm...last year I got a call from the IRS saying they were going to arrest me if I didn't pay them over the phone..that was phone scam and the reason I knew is because the guy sounded like an Islamic terrorist..

but this new letter seemed the IRS claims they need more info or my refund will be less or my taxes will be more..a veiled blood pressure is rising as my anger swells...

so the IRS has an "input rejection team" now and I've never heard of that.. I sent my taxes in via postal mail and now they say they need more info on Schedule A (Itemized Deductions) and they want me to fill in lines 16, 17, and 18 for them

so I looked at the form and it's Gifts To Charity....I give tons of stuff to an Oxnard charity about four or five times a year..they send a truck and I give...Line 16 does not apply because I don't give cash; Line 17 clearly states if gifts over $500, attach Form 8283 which is what I did; Line 18 does not apply

so I don't know what the IRS wants and I guess neither do they because they are dumb motherfuckers!!

I will vote for ANYONE who abolishes the IRS.. I don't mind paying a small tax for basic services, but the IRS is outta control and another, smaller entity needs to replace it and stop wasting my time

and I want that on the record

Sunday, May 22, 2016

For All We Know

love... look at the two of us... strangers in many ways

I gotta be real dang careful about emails I get...I'm cautious by nature but if you're too cautious you miss things so you gotta be a little reckless too.. I get emails from girls, real pretty girls, then they disappear into the moonlit outback!

for all I know the folks who send me emails may all be just one joker trying to make a fool outta me which actually is pretty easy

but anyway I got an email about Ty Warner..I read about Ty alot in the court calendars and the guy who is suing him in small claims for unlawful eviction or something...and I got no real issue with Ty other than he's a tax cheat and totally femmed-out Channel Drive and messed up the Coral Casino...Ty wouldn't know a cabana from a banana

so the email links me to this: Clubhouse on Wheels: TY WARNER & THE BILTMORE


so I check it out and the Biltmore bar seemingly has turned all Van Gogh in the throes of Vinnie's's a ghostly vision where the only patrons are indeed ghosts with one or two fleshy beings drinking some wine trying to figure out what happened

well I'll tell ya what happened...this is can get rich selling stupid little bear dolls and then buy all the properties in Montecito and turn them into fancy crappers..the Montecito County Club is wasted, the San Ysidro Ranch is unrecognizable...

the Ty Warner Sea Center was a joke...

it's enough to drive a guy insane

Saturday, May 21, 2016

Before The Deluge

Some of them were dreamers and some of them were fools who were making plans and thinking of the future

God grants one miracle each and Santa Barbara got one in the 1990s during the March deluge..this was after the drought when people were painting their lawns green and talking about tankering in water from Alaska

but before the deluge voters approved State Water and Desal....the desal plant was built at a pretty good cost and was on line for about a day, for the ribbon-cutting ceremony, they handed out bottles of desal water and I got one somehow...then the March Miracle filled up the reservoirs and lakes and aquifers..and flooded the streets and roofs leaked after the deluge

so the desal plant sat idle for awhile and was allowed to fall into disrepair..then after some years some parts were sold off rendering the plant's like buying a  1960s Corvette and not driving it, then selling the parts for some spare change..nonsensical

so it's 2016 and we enter into another drought...this one started in 2010 approx...we've had a smattering of rain here and there and some parts of California have sufficient rainfall, but not here...the bright red Devil Joni sang about has moved here

ok so now they are resurrecting the desal plant at much more expense because Cachuma is really low and the wineries are overdrafting the groundwater basins to keep Valley folks drunk...

I used to live for wine women and song..and still do....fuck the drought!!

but as I passed by the desal plant recently, I thought what a waste..all the city of SB had to do was keep it primed until the next drought and then bring it on line as needed...instead they let it deteriorate and now they are rebuilding triple the cost!!!

and I bet this winter will bring the rain we need

but will it bring any common sense??

Friday, May 20, 2016

Sunny Afternoon

I got a big fat mama trying to break me

ok so Texas conservatives hate California...Bush, Enron and Plains All American Pipeline...all conspired to harm the golden state...why? San Francisco I guess is too liberal for some Texicans...

so I see Plains All American is being sued by everyone for the Refugio oil spill last year...Plains is culpable because their pipeline was corroded to the point of springing a leak which turned into a big ass spill..on shore, then off shore fouling the coast line from Gaviota to ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure

so I'm watching the news and KEYT has some good coverage...they are on top of it..they got a line on it...

but I see some old familiar faces of "environmentalists" standing in front of the cameras at the news conference...there's Princess Kira from SB Channelkeepers and that weird gal from the Environmental Defense Center... now if these two nonprofits were effective at protectiong the environment, why did they allow Plains Oil to spill and kill all those poor sea birds and sea lions and seals and so forth? Princess Kira likes to sue gov't agencies to keep her lawyers rich and so she can buy boats and keep her fat girlfriends supplied with cheeseburgers...but if the ciy sewer line spills a few gallons you can be sure that Princess will be at the city council meeting threatening a lawsuit and demanding money...for cheeseburgers for the fat chick

so the question is why don't these environmental nonprofits really do the hard work to actually protect the environment? why weren't they monitoring the PRIVATE oil lines that transport oil so close to the ocean? because it's easier to get money from the city taxpayers than from a private entity maybe...

well I think that Channelkeeper and EDC are pretty worthless...wannabe environmentalists, posers, and hacks..nonprofits whose only real concern is gathering donor and taxpayer money to perpetuate their uselessness..I would never send these bozos even a dime because it would only go to feed the big fat gal more cheeseburgers!! haha

but there they were in front of the camera a year AFTER THE FACT, saying they will be monitoring the coast..

but oh I feel so much better now that Princess, Channelkeeper and that fat blubbery chick, stuffing her big fat face with cheesburgers, will be monitoring the coast..


Thursday, May 19, 2016

And When I Die

and when I'm gone, there'll be one child born in a world to carry on

geez, no sooner than I write about one booze calamity, another one pops up

what's up wih these soap opera actresses? look we're all actors on the stage of life but if you can't get through the day to day without booze, then you should commit yourself to an institution....if you want to drink for a living, move to Scotland

what? are they re-making Valley of the Dolls? you soap gals can't hold a candle to Patty, Barbara and Sharon!

now I mentioned some pickup truck drivers were crashing into things while drunk and now I hear about an actress crashing her Mercedes into a Ford (ironic!!) on the Chumash Highway of Death, fondly known in old westerns as San Marcos Pass..

but this actress chick was ID'd as Jensen Buchanan and she was arrested for DUI...KEYT said that not me so don't go suing me for repeating it here....and EDHAT gots a story on her too so sue Ed

I've never heard of Jensen Buchanan because I don't watch soaps because I'm not brain-damaged but her pic ain't so bad..kinda pretty but apparently separated from her wealthy Hollywood hubby..

then there's another soap actress from Montecito has some issues and her name is always on the criminal court calendar for probation violation or something..she starred in the soap "Santa Barbara" and got death threats about playing some character...

hey I get death threats all the's murder!! deal with it!

I think this is where Santa Barbara went wrong...all these silly soaps and fading pretty faces..

and death threats

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Pick Up The Pieces

ah huh

pickup truck drivers are not generally drunk redneck hillbillies...some of us are poets, philosophers, writers, plumbers, plainsmen, road warriors..or guitar pickers adrift in the sea of life


but a few pickup truck drivers were recently involved in crashes that did some damage...and alcohol was involved (allegedly but we know that means the guys were drunk if you see the pictures)

if you get busted for DUI it doesn't mean you were DUI, just that cops had reasonable suspicion to pull you over and determine if you are drunk...the cops used to pull people over BEFORE they plowed into a tree, a house or knocked someone down and killed them..but now, we have to wait until the drunk hits someone or something...

did this change when Cam Sanchez left? the conservatives were upset that the cops were treating drunks unfairly?

possible the booze lobby in town pitched in to keep the cops focused on homeless folks instead of drunk drivers..and the News-Press and Peter Lance didn't help either with their cuckoo "expose" of the SB cops which was just a nonsensical hack job becasue ol' Pete got busted in 2011 and blamed the cops

ok but people are still drinking and driving and the Mesa is getting lots of incidents...are there some new bars or dives up there in Never Never land?

well the craft beer fad is still going on as new breweries appear on every corner now..and wine tasting fad encourages you to stop and taste wine in the middle of the day... and some people will never give up hard's the alcohol culture...lots of alcoholics out there... still driving

the distillers and breweries and pro-drinking media like the News-Press and Independent got weak people by the balls and when the weaklings drive drunk the taxpayer cleans up the mess and pays for it too!

does that sound fair??

we need a booze calamity tax

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Sweet Leilani

Sweet Leilani, heavenly flower oh. / I dreamt of paradise for two. (My lovely Leilani)


censorship.. I hate it..esp in film when some idiots take out all the good stuff and leave me with some inane version of the's fuckin' infuriating!! oh excuse me, I meant to say it's fruitfully infuriating

so I was in Heaven watching Footlight Parade with James Cagney and Joan Blondell..a pre-code 1930s film that is raunchy funny and the girls are gorgeous... pre-code films are now my new hobby

this film is very much a fun gag

first part, Cagney is running around while everyone forsakes him except Blondell

then the Honeymoon Hotel sequence which is hilarious with the brilliantly annoying Dick Powell singing and running from a weird little kid..and scantily clad women everywhere!! awesome

then the visually stunning sequence of the Water Nymphs sequence doing stuff I've never even dreamt black and white

then Shanghai Lil...I have no idea why she was there but I'm glad she was!

"Made when the New Deal was new and fertile, the chemistry between the immortals Cagney and Blondell produces three classic prologues. Berkeley pairs rapper Dick Powell in bed with newlywed Ruby Keeler at the Honeymoon Hotel. Then a supernatural Keeler and a blond aquatic assembly line are employed as geometric designs. Finally, Cagney, the producer, falls onto the stage to become a sailor and to retrieve Keeler from an opium den. Together, Keeler and Cagney merge with dozens of sailors marching in formation, who turn over a collective face card, FDR's portrait, trumping Depression and Fear Itself, as well as all those individual flaws and failings personified by the minor characters and ourselves"

then the "code" was instituted...

anybody who claims to have the corner on public morality and decency is not to be trusted!!