Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween!

SCOTT..your mother sucks cocks in Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NIPPER..your mother sucks cocks in Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
so the News-Press wants you to call them if you are concerned about anything suspicious, like porn on the company's computer or fraud in this year's elections...of course, the only reason the N-P wants you to call them is they fear their pet candidates will lose big, so they can blame it on election fraud and the student or illegal immigrant vote...
So if you suspect any fraud or anything unusual anywhere, you're asked to notify the News-Press?? If someone perpetrated fraud on me the last one I'd call is the News-Press!! but I'm sure the crack reporters will investigate and give an honest review of whatever people complain about...like...eeek, there's a liberal voting..or eek, there's five students voting....or eeek..a Mexican just voted!!! or someone just offered me $100 dollars to vote for Meg Whitman!!
please call the News-Press at 564-5273 and encourage their delusions with any reports your imagination can conjure up..for example: one ringy dingy, two ringy dingy..um, hello...News-Press? I would like to report a donkey driving a Mercedes in Hope Ranch, please help...
let's keep 'em busy this election season!!
that's 564-5273....again 564-5273.....remember 564-5273....don't hesitate, it's 564-5273....

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Once again, your assessment is spot-on. Wendy McCaw is desperately trying to prop up the News-Press as a powerful influence in the community. If her candidates win, she'll credit the paper. If they lose, she'll claim election fraud and promise a thorough investigation. Maybe she'll even pull a Nancy Crawford-Hall and bankroll her faves. Expect Scott Steepleton to do the "reporting."

Mick Von Caw said...

the first thing I will do Tues after voting is call the hotline and complain about the N-P masquerading as a real newspaper!

Anonymous said...

Bawahahaha! I love how you balance all out outrageousness with solid insight into the local shame that is the News Press. Wendy McCall, I hope you lose you shirt trying to keep you rag afloat and you alienate readers with your bigoted one-track mind as a publisher.