good vibrations

daughters of darkness....
so I'm watching the baseball game last night and afterwards started flipping through the channels, Anthony Bourdain, Pawn Stars, a stop at BYUTV..the Mormon channel where they were talking about successful marriages...if you put God first, your marriage will be ok and I suppose if you need a third party to stay together, who cares if it's me, God or a vibrating cobra. Let me explain....while I was flipping channels, I see an ad from Trojan, the rubber company. Well, the commercial had a gal with a squeaky yet sexy voice shouting about the virtues about this little machine that comes in its own sack, or pouch for $39.95....apparently, it is some sort of vibration mechanism that may cause side effects like "shouts of ecstacy" "curled toes" "fits of pleasure" ....the product is called Trojan Vibrating Triphoria from Trojan Vibrations and you can buy one for yourself or give some out to your friends..the ad showed a blonde woman driving down the road throwing her clothes off and smiling radiantly...well, they didn't say exactly how the thing works so I don't know what's going on and I need to know what's going on so I went on line to find out what's going on...needless to say I was shocked...first of all Texas bans these little things maybe because they don't want women vibrating and driving geez we got enough problems with them texting and gabbing on their cell phones while driving..but there's also the morality issue and if you need to resort to a life of ease and hedonism, you should be ashamed of yourselves.... however, girls will be girls and I don't want you to hurt yourselves so I did a safety check for you and some issues popped up and if you buy a Triphoria beware it's not waterproof, and the batteries last only about 30 minutes..and well... ladies...why not just use a maglight for Pete's sake??