if you put Peter Lance, Nipper, Mr. Wimpy and that Montecito artist chump Thomas Van Mentally-Challenged (keeps painting the same thing over and over!) in a room with Robert Eringer, writer and barfly, I'd say Eringer is the only one with any talent...surrounding himself with dummies is a strategy I've long employed so I look and feel smarter, but for me it doesn't work all the time because ultimately, I'm not as smart as you think I am
but Eringer with all his spy stuff, Princess Grace, the stories, the groovy oratory is either a genuis or a shaman...and Bo Henry's bar of ill-repute? well it just adds to the intrigue
but I did... I THINK I DID...get an email about a rancher in Carpinteria, ASA ALLEN...never heard of him but Eringer's Surreal Bounce website is investigating Asa's recent death.. was Asa a drunk who grew avocados and pot on his ranch??
the BOUNCY WEBSITE TOOK THE POST OFF AND NOW ASA CAN RIP..ok groovy...make up your minds gentlemen!!
but the ranches behind Carpinteria along Highway 192 have some stories to tell...
I fell in love with Carp after living on Rancho Monte Alegre for a few years...for $600 per month, I had the privilege of living in Olive Carey's old pink bungalow...her ghost was there..she died in that house..and then I moved in...after work, I'd drive home in the wee hours and the yellow moon over the hills was my guiding light
the ranch owners, who were all insane and very colorful and included the Colonel, Maxi, and that nutty Segal woman, told me stories of Olive's cocktail parties with John Wayne and Robert Mitchum....Olive starred in the great old westerns and Wayne and Mitchum did "El Dorado", my fave western...John Wayne, Robert Mitchum, Jame Caan and Edgar Allan Poe...AWESOME!!!
Listed in Forbes as one of the ten best ranches in the USA, Rancho Monte Alegre lost some mojo when it was sold to a developer and Arnold bought a house there..the thought of Arnold and Rob Lowe hanging around Carp gave me a heart murmur
and then there was the Young Ranch...John and June Young...June invented Santa Claus Lane and the Big Yellow House...Playmate Kym Herrin lived up there for awhile with Danny Young...I gave Kym a ride in my truck down to Kim's Market one day..she was just so sweet and nice...Doobie Bros Tom Johnstone lived up there for a spell
Kym Herrin poses for me!! |
June Young rented out the cabins to folks and had a great big colorful Christmas Party every year
but the ranches had some secrets..some guns and drugs...the gals would skinny dip in the pond, right next to my cabin....my ramshackle cabin...one night I heard some commotion up the road and Josh and his girl were fighting..Josh had a gun and I went in and got it from him..told him he could get it tomorrow when he sobered up...the old west..we don't call the cops, we take care of things ourselves
the land was beautiful with plenty of wildlife and trees and rolling hills and vulgar Carpinteria farm girls....drugs did some serious damage to some of the folks on the ranches so the beauty of the land and the underlying insanity was very appealing to me ...I just had to live in this area!!
now this Asa guy that Eringer is telling about...his ranch must be next...what's buried there beneath the avocado groves? what secrets are whispered in the wind at night?
the story will unfold because the story must be told..these ranches up here in Carpinteria..the ag must be protected at all costs even if odd Dutch immigrants grow the flowers with illegals helping
but these ranches were just too cool...there's so much history back there...
back there..back there's where you got to go..back there
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