Sunday, November 16, 2008

Redheads Drool....

What do you call a redhead with an attitude?– Normal!

We all know angry women are scary to be around, but I wonder if there are different degrees of angry when it comes to hair color? When blondes get angry, their eyes bulge out and they sleep with someone else! When brunettes get angry, they ignore you! When blackhaired girls get pissed off, they stare at you! When redhaired women get angry, they...organize!!
A new political party has been formed called the "Red Haired People's Party (RHPP) and here's what they want: (so says Michael Heaton)

1) The term "red-head" be replaced by "Orange Follicled Americans" or "OFAs"
2) A national apology, memorial and financial compensation for the descendants of those OFAs who were burned at the stake as witches in Salem, Mass., in 1692.
3) All OFAs become available for Affirmative Action consideration and illegal immigration to Ireland.
4) free government sponsored anti-freckle sunscreen program for all OFAs.
ban all "Archie" comics
5) the planet Mars is henceforth called the Cool Red Dot in the Sky.
When asked by reporters what plans she had for the party, RHPP chairperson Denise Zagnicky said: Some people are bringing dips and chips. We're doing a mostly cold salad thing. Beer, wine, soda and deviled eggs, but no paprika...
When I spotted Denise in a restaurant recently, I got a little taste of the angry red female..
Me: Hi Denise, I see you're wearing a red sweater today, may I call you "Red"?
Denise: May I take a knife to your throat and make that white shirt and bow tie you are wearing turn red the natural way?
Me: Sorry..hey, what are your three biggest concerns?
Denise: the price of sunscreen,crime and illegal irrigation.
Me: Illegal irrigation? You should visit Montecito sometime..they got the water on all the time everywhere!
Denise: Impressive..
I thanked her for stopping to at least talk to me and went home...later that night I decided to paint all the stop signs in town blue.. just for Denise and her odd friends, the Red Headed Strangers.....

2 comments:

See the light said...

Mick, you were wearing a BOW TIE?!!!

No wonder you complain about bad luck with women.

Mick said...

I thought bow ties were cool..no?? Is that why women scowl at me? How shallow!