Do It Again

 go back Jack, do it again..wheels turning round and round

so I had to go into Santa Barbara again..again! well you see I'm on jury duty stand-by which means I gotta call the courthouse after 5:30 pm to check my status..my status is PISSED OFF!!  do they pay you for the stand-by/ on call type deal?

well they better...

and it's another hot December day..the sun is killing me.. I can't breathe, I can't breathe

but anyway I'm doing the errands before the courts call me and I finish then I get on the highway, southbound..wheels a'turnin' when I spy a white Dodge Ram pick-up truck sneak up behind me around Hot Springs, where the lanes go from three to two..this guy is on my bumper practically and won't let off so I figure he's gay...why else would a man follow me? and who drives a Ram pickup anyway? my Chevy could've smoked him..maybe he was suffering from an inferiority complex...

I feel road rage coming on...lucky for me I'm cool but packin' heat..the most powerful handgun in the world and could blow this fucker's head clean off




so I call 911 and report a possible drunk driver...the chick transfers me to Highway Patrol where I get a recording! must be the patrol folks are having sex or something...then finally a chick answers so I give her the details...there's this guy in a white RAM pick-up truck speeding and tailgating me and everyone else, then he gets off on Padaro.... so I tell the dispatcher I'm following him and she tells me not to.. I say I follow everyone if they are in front of me..then she says DON'T FOLLOW HIM!!

I ask her "why not?"

then she says if I continue to follow him, she'll end the call....end our conversation..that's the Highway Patrol policy!!

then I say if she ends the call she's letting a possible drunk driver go and she'll hear from me and my lawyer (a bluff)...so I hang up..I gave her the info she needed and she tells me how to drive!! treats me like a criminal!!

so I swing in to Loon Point parking lot..wait a bit, then proceed down Padaro and see the RAM truck parked in front of a beach house

I know there's rich and famous people who live on Padaro Lane but the Highway Patrol should have busted this asshole RAM driver for at least reckless driving...and check his license for previous issues

hey maybe I'll bring this all up at the courthouse- the  jury duty voir dire... and they gonna get an earful!