ok it's Saturday and the Unity Shoppe Telethon is on KEYT and I'm feeling weird like worms are crawling all over me...ok they did some nice tribute to Debby Davison but then creepy-cheesy Nipper and sex-kitten Beth are next as hosts and they act all hopped-up on something..Beth looks like Doris in "Miracle on 34th Street" directing a Macy's Christmas parade all sociable and everything a direct contrast to her angry-anchor schtick on KEYT...
doing a telethon with a racist like Nipper is pretty pathetic but who needs ethics when you're a TV star!
look... what happens is they raise some money but not as much as the old days when Paula Lopez was singing duets with Kenny Loggins..now that was a Christmas telethon!! we need you Paula..we need you clean and sober right this very minute
but anyway they raise a little money and at the end of the show the Chumash kick in a bunch of gambling profits...then all that money goes to a store that poor Mexicans can shop at for free...wouldn't the illegals be better off stealing?? at least they get to choose who they are gonna rob
ok..plus you gotta honor Kenny Loggins to get stuff.. the Kenny Loggins Event Center?? Celebrate Me Home?? wow what an egomaniac! Elvis was the King not Kenny Loggins! plus Kenny's got man-boobs now which is NOT COOL for a rock-n-roll star! and Herman the Hermits singer...geez..nice pair of tits..a D Cup! are these dudes going tranny?? what a shame.. I was a big fan of their music when they were guys not dolls
the Unity Shoppe gives lots of stuff to kids which drives home the notion that mom and dad can't provide for their family so what good are they? never forget what the 1% does for you poor people
so I watch a little more and it gets weirder and weirder..they're talking about the Unity Shoppe mortgage and paying it off...another nonproft begging for money...Alan Thicke does a cameo and there's a pastor and a banker and realtor...and just below the surface of all these phony smiles you can see the disappointment of lost years
"it's Christmas once agin in Santa Barbara" hic |
and when I thought it couldn't get any worse, there's Wendy McCuckoo doing an "I support Unity" cameo plug...all for a good cause but geez she looks like a skinny little old bag lady who been hitting the bottle a little too much or chewin' tebackky!
I believe in unity..it's silly but I believe
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