Sunday, May 20, 2012

sympathy for the devil

a Rabbi was having sex with a goat....that's it..that's the joke!! hahaha

I was watching the Worthen One on One Shoggw, better known on this bloggggah as the Mr. Wimpy Show and Mr. Wimpy was hhhgggginterviewing a Rabbi who is rhhhhhhunning for the US Senate...gaagaggeez..some of you gaahhhfolks in SB give the homeless a hard time for the way they look, what about this ggggghhhuy...he looks like hhhhhhhe crawled out from under a pile of cgagagagow dhhhhgggung....(I'm trying to sound like a rabbi here)

I only watched for a few minutes but he went on and on about the evils of socialism and communism and how evil the American union workers are....and Mr. Wimpy just kept nodding his head and looking us with his beady little rat eyes....the Rabbi has a little rep for being a racist nutjob...Nachum Shifren: Racist Rabbi Still Trying to Run For Senate Seat ... Shifren's nutty views in its headline: Rabbi's Speech Called Hateful. and so on....goofshig schmil luck Rabbi!

then I hear some Baptist senator in Mississippi wants to kill people who are gay because the bible says we should...I have no problem with that if that's the way America wants to go, but we need to include other trangressions when we throw out the rule of law in favor of God's Law..

The act of murder is rampant in the Bible. In much of the Bible, especially the Old Testament, there are laws that command that people be killed for absurd reasons such as working on the Sabbath, being gay, cursing your parents, or not being a virgin on your wedding night. In addition to these crazy and immoral laws, there are plenty of examples of God's irrationality by his direct killing of many people for reasons that defy any rational explanation such as killing children who make fun of bald people, and the killing of a man who tried to keep the ark of God from falling during transport. There are also countless examples of mass murders commanded by God, including the murder of women, infants, and children.

The following passages are a very small percentage of the total passages approving of murder in the Bible. They are divided here into three parts: 1) Capital Punishment Crimes, 2) God's Murders for Stupid Reasons, 3) Murdering Children, and 4) Miscellaneous Murders. This list is long, but it barely scratches the surface of all the murders approved of in the Bible.

1) Capital Punishment Crimes:

Kill People Who Don't Listen to Priests


Anyone arrogant enough to reject the verdict of the judge or of the priest who represents the LORD your God must be put to death. Such evil must be purged from Israel. (Deuteronomy 17:12 NLT)

Kill Witches


You should not let a sorceress live. (Exodus 22:17 NAB)

Kill Homosexuals

"If a man lies with a male as with a women, both of them shall be put to death for their abominable deed; they have forfeited their lives." (Leviticus 20:13 NAB)

Kill Fortunetellers


A man or a woman who acts as a medium or fortuneteller shall be put to death by stoning; they have no one but themselves to blame for their death. (Leviticus 20:27 NAB)

Death for Cursing Parents

1) If one curses his father or mother, his lamp will go out at the coming of darkness. (Proverbs 20:20 NAB)

2) All who curse their father or mother must be put to death. They are guilty of a capital offense. (Leviticus 20:9 NLT)

Death for Adultery


If a man commits adultery with another man's wife, both the man and the woman must be put to death. (Leviticus 20:10 NLT)

Death for Fornication


A priest's daughter who loses her honor by committing fornication and thereby dishonors her father also, shall be burned to death. (Leviticus 21:9 NAB)

Kill Nonbelievers

They entered into a covenant to seek the Lord, the God of their fathers, with all their heart and soul; and everyone who would not seek the Lord, the God of Israel, was to be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman. (2 Chronicles 15:12-13 NAB)

Kill the Entire Town if One Person Worships Another God


Suppose you hear in one of the towns the LORD your God is giving you that some worthless rabble among you have led their fellow citizens astray by encouraging them to worship foreign gods. In such cases, you must examine the facts carefully. If you find it is true and can prove that such a detestable act has occurred among you, you must attack that town and completely destroy all its inhabitants, as well as all the livestock. Then you must pile all the plunder in the middle of the street and burn it. Put the entire town to the torch as a burnt offering to the LORD your God. That town must remain a ruin forever; it may never be rebuilt. Keep none of the plunder that has been set apart for destruction. Then the LORD will turn from his fierce anger and be merciful to you. He will have compassion on you and make you a great nation, just as he solemnly promised your ancestors. "The LORD your God will be merciful only if you obey him and keep all the commands I am giving you today, doing what is pleasing to him." (Deuteronomy 13:13-19 NLT)

Kill Women Who Are Not Virgins On Their Wedding Night


But if this charge is true (that she wasn't a virgin on her wedding night), and evidence of the girls virginity is not found, they shall bring the girl to the entrance of her fathers house and there her townsman shall stone her to death, because she committed a crime against Israel by her unchasteness in her father's house. Thus shall you purge the evil from your midst. (Deuteronomy 22:20-21 NAB)
totally kosher!!


Gangsta Gawd said...

C-i-L-L Mista Whimpy for puttin impur-it-ies in his body puffin on smokes. Must be awll pissed bout dem ciggybutt taxes.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha! Great stuff! I liked "uh, oh..." Let he who is without sin outta my life, that's what I say.