Thursday, May 31, 2012

everybody loves a clown...

citizen alert!!

after telling Mr. Wimpy he was "emasculated" by the "vicious" Carp city council, and having finished the "100 day no-driving" part of his sentence, councilman Jose Armendariz is back behind the least this is one ignorant Mexican who is trying to turn his life around...please be carful of a swift moving Mercedes in Carpinteria!!

here are the News-Press endorsements for the upcoming elections...

for U.S. Senate -Orly Taitz

for County supe-Steve Pappas

House of Rep-Chris Mitchum

for County supe- Joni Gray

and NO on Prop 29....

I'll discuss Orly today and the others on an as needed basis....

I was soooo tickled when I saw the News-Press endorses Orly Taitz, the Russian broad that thinks Obama is an illegal alien and should be disqualified from serving as president..of course she started the birther movement....Obama is black and his middle name is Hussein so he must be a Muslim terrorist and certainly not an American....that's the level of analysis from the teabaggers and their uneducated sympathizers...

great news! Dr. Taitz increases lead over all CA candidates
California Survey of 500 Likely Voters
Conducted April 5, 2012
By Pulse Opinion Research

ok.. I've seen Orly Taitz speak and although I'd fuck her, I wouldn't necessarily vote for her unless she comes up with real evidence against Obama....Orly is a psycho blonde that I'm sorry I have no power to resist sexually but we're not talking about sex here..we're talking about getting her elected to the Senate...I don't think she has a chance but reality has become somewhat distorted over the last few years, and she could pull an upset and indeed be the new norm..crazy is the new sane now? well If Obama is illegal, then I think he should finish out his term under a "guest worker" program like Wendy's "guest editorials"...

however, Orly is a better birther than dentist!











the Republicans it seems have turned into a bunch of bafflegabbers!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

oogum boogum

mission statement: to punitively punish each and every one of you!

I spent an hour at the Carp cemetery for Memorial Day services....there were flags and people and America was shining in the little town..and the beach was buzzing with summer fun

I made a friend and his name is Sam..Sam the Flying Horse of a Different Color you may have heard about....he was pretty cool and not at all stuffy..he was smart, too..I asked him about William the Wonder Horse and Sam said he knew William, but they traveled in different circles...I was speaking to Sam telepathically of course...he told me some secrets about William that are best left alone..for now...

oh here's a weird tale of people drinking alcohol and then trying to walk and drive...according to KEYT, a woman was killed crossing the street at Cabrillo Blvd, at night, after attending some sort of wedding party....she crossed in a non-pedestrian area and was struck and killed by a 22 year man driving an SUV..the driver blew a 0.03 BAC...that's about one drink and your driving skills will be are under the influence regardless what the "law" says...getting behind the wheel after even one drink is just stupid.....

unknown if the lady killed had been drinking..

and after the cops put up barricades to warn other drivers about the accident, ANOTHER DRUNK DRIVER came along and crashed into them!!

unfortunately, these incidents won't do a thing to curb drinking and driving..the booze culture is too entrenched in Santa Barbara and you simply can't take their bottle at the Zoo, Tequila at the Natural History Museum, liquor parties at the History Museum, Wine Festivals..and on and on...and idiots try to tell me it's all normal...people trying to rationalize drunk driving...the level of ignorance about alcohol is mind-boggling...

I may have to take my investigations and expositions to another level... stick around...

and there's that highly respected society gal Erin Graffy popping up again (geez, this chick is like a zit!) writing fluff for the she's basically an airhead conservative sucking up to Wendy's ill gotten money so she can keep her name in the spotlight..isn't she the daughter of that goofy ex- politician lady....


Monday, May 28, 2012

the smoker you drink

don't be an idiot..VOTE YES ON 29!!

ok so Little Orphan Andy opposes the cigarette tax...why? because it's a tax...considering the amount of cigarette butts on the ground and stinky smoke in the air, I think you should pay $20 per pack...that includes all the time spent picking up the junkies' litter...Carp a has a ban against public smoking..GOOD..there's no reason to smoke anymore..none whatsoever..if you  have an oral fixation, get some therapy..if you are constantly sucking on a cigar or cigarette, you may be gay, guys..think about it next time you take a smoke break with your guy pal, you little faggots....Little Orphan Andy may be latent gay!!

now I don't really care where the money goes, but sin taxes are a good thing...if you can't control your addictions, why should I subsidize your sinny behavior?? you should pay, not me..

now, as to Andy's writing ability....well, gee...I'm starting to miss Terry least Tyler had an education..

Andy says he doesn't want to be singled out and "punitively punished" for bad or risky behavior..."punitively punished" ?? in other words "punished in a punishing manner"....

I think Andy needs a remedial English grammar course! see Jane run..see Jane run up a hill.... see Jane put a cigarette in her mouth..hey that ain't no cigarette!! GO JANE!!

so the obvious answer to all these questions posed by the News-Press dummies is to vote YES ON 29... that is VOTE YES ON 29 IN AN AFFIRMATIVE MANNER!! or you will be punitively punished by the punishers..
and all the NO on Prop 29 ads are paid for by RJ Reynolds know them: Winston tastes good like a ..cigarette should..

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Cheryl's Goin' Home....

and so am I about 11 pm....after the show at the Carp Plaza Theater....Danny O'Keefe and Bob Lind played to almost 50 people...

just two guitars and two guys doing some songs....probably not a great idea to do a show on Memorial Day weekend in an obscure little theater in an obscure little beach town, but we got a good show and the people were pretty noisy and! we had the whole place to ourselves! I've never been to the Plaza theater and it's pretty cool....old school, comfy seats with cup holders...and a great view of the a mini Lobero!

oh, the News-Press did a story on the guys prior to tonight but said they would be at the Santa Barbara Bowl on June1st at 4 pm!

O'Keefe started his set at 8pm and for about an hour and a half, I was pretty amazed at this guy...he started with So Long Harry Truman and ended with Good Time between there was The Road and other stone beauties....superb guitarist and in good voice, O'Keefe told some stories and seemed almost relieved the crowd was small...there was banter back and forth between the guys and the audience that was pretty funny....

and there was nothing fancy here except the smoke rising from the stage, no fire breathing nonsense a la KISS, no dancing naked girls....just music...the kind that very few can approach...

Lind came on after O'Keefe and said he was thrilled to be doing a little tour with Danny...his first song was marred by an out-of -tune guitar....a pesky Martin D-28 so Lind changed over to another box..then came back and lamented about out-of-tune guitars...finally he got the expensive Martin tuned up and picked up steam after that...both these guys put on a songwriting clinic..I couldn't believe some of the lyrics I was hearing....that's why I fell in love with their songs, they communicated exactly what I felt but couldn't quite say when I was coming of age....even now the new stuff is wonderful...

it was like watching Robert Frost and ee cummings with a was lovely!! Lind did "Elusive Butterfly" near the end and I was singing right along with everyone else...

after the show, Lind hung out in the lobby to greet people...his and O'Keefe's CDs were on sale..these are still working class guys who made tons of money in their prime writing songs for other people...I've been a fan for a long time and they are in their 60s now, yet they stilled loved getting up and singing in front of a small crowd....and I got Lind to sign a CD and spoke with him about the early days with Jack Nitzsche and the Springfield... I felt like a freaking kid!! if I was a chick, I woulda been a good groupie!

walking thru the doors of the Plaza Theater is like stepping back in's hoping it will continue to bring such talent...people like Lind and O'Keefe are a joy to watch in such an intimate setting...give it time....give it's just something you can't Cheryl goin' home

Saturday, May 26, 2012

talk to the animals

breaking news: William the Wonder Horse has DIED!! (but don't worry, you can still talk to him!)

a wake will be held at Summerland beach where William became famous for trying to swim away from his psycho captors..interment will be at the Santa Barbara Cemetery in Montecito..or is that the Montecito Cemetery in Santa Barbara... a statue of Will has already been erected at the Harbor..


well shit now I know who is behind all these crazy lady pet psychics..WENDY!! these people have personified animals! they talk to dead animals..they consult psychics to see what live animals are thinking..and that's what William's owners did! Mindy Peters and her daughter talked to a psychic in Florida about what William the Wonder Horse was thinking and how he liked living in California...Will is cool with it, says the psychic!!

well I've spoken with dogs and cats before..mostly cats because they are smarter than dogs..and cats are funny too..and silly..but me talking to them is just me talking..they don't know WTF to make of it as long as I feed them and play with them....

but there's no psychic telepathic thing going on between animals and people..any supernatural relationship you may perceive with an animal is all in your mind....and consulting a psychic to see what your horse is thinking is just plain...well.....McCuckoo!

so when I read about the pet psychics over at the Independent and one church pastor lady offering a seminar on how to talk to animals for$59, well, I just figure people have lost their minds...

How to Talk to Animals Workshop

Develop telepathic communication skills in this introductory course with animal communicator Suzan Vaughn. Must preregister.
When: Saturday, May 19, 2012, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Where: Spiritualist Church of the Comforter, 1028 Garden St, Santa Barbara
Cost: $59
Age limit: Not available
Categories: Classes
Description: Scholarships are available. Bring photo of your pet. Please preregister through the church by Sunday, May 13. Contact Rev. Judy Campbell-Clark (805) 965-4474.
Phone: 805-965-4474

but it's no big's how you talk to animals..

a dog: sit!

a cat: here kitty!

a worm: roll over

a horse: wanna go for a swim??

a bird: you're worth more in a bush

a fish: can you tuna piano??

where'd all these loopy people come from?? maybe they were animals in a past life....

Friday, May 25, 2012

starry starry night

paint your palette blue and gray

what a pretty song!!

Flaming flowers that brightly blaze,
Swirling clouds in violet haze,

Starry, starry night.
Portraits hung in empty halls,
Frameless head on nameless walls,
With eyes that watch the world and can't forget.

Like the strangers that you've met,
The ragged men in the ragged clothes,
The silver thorn of bloody rose,
Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow.

Now I think I know what you tried to say to me,
How you suffered for your sanity,
How you tried to set them free.
They would not listen, they're not listening still.

Perhaps they never will...

Thursday, May 24, 2012

so long Harry Truman..

goddam it's hard to find an honest man....

I haven't been following the Montecito Motors saga because I would never buy a fancy car from two guys with beady eyes named Chester and Chester! I wouldn't even buy a motorcycle from them! Chester and Chester are being sued by a gal named Sheila Price..and by JP Morgan Chase bank who just lost 17 billion and is being sued by shareholders...and a gal or guy named Renate Haeusler is suing Chester and Chester....these boys is in big trouble....

there's a lot of commotion in Montecito with regards to civil lawsuits....furthur proof that people would rather be tangled in litigation than live free in the presence of the Lord....

so we got the Montecito Water District being sued by Sod Farmer and Polo star wannabe hotelier Pat Nesbit who just hosted an fundraidser for the old soft porn star Chris Mitchum...

the Montecito Water District is suing Price Postel & Parma etc....they had some issues with the Ortega Reservoir cover being that it was poorly engineered...let me say this, I will always be against covering water reservoirs because they look cool uncovered...water is freedom, water is life, don't waste it!!

and Montecito Bank and Trust is always involved in lots of lawsuits, this time as a plaintiff againt a bunch of people named's a clan of folks there's Christine and Peter and Steven and Eric and Dion and David..whew..ever hear of birth control, guys???

and the Montecito Fire Protection District is being sued by a gal named Rhonda..I don't know what that's about but it's common knowledge that the Mont Fire District under Kevin Wallace sat on its ass while the Tea Fire burned...Mountain Drivers told me as much....

but know can cut down all the brush and get a defensible space around your house in a high fire area, but if conditions are right, nothing can stop another huge fire event from simply can't stop the ride like the wind!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

pleasures of the harbor

smart elusive and strong..the mighty permit

well I was reading the News-Press on Tuesday after I got back from the Harbor...what a lovely place the Harbor's got boats and people and pretty girls and birds and fish and water and sunshine...key ingredients for a happy life...I saw a lovely lady dressed in black tights...we passed each other on the sidewalk area by the boats..I looked back at her..she looked back at me..I looked back at her..she looked back at me, I looked down at a starfish in the water, then back at the gal and she disappreared over the railing into the water......I will be back until I find her again....that beautiful mermaid.... I want to look at her again!

thick as a brick
the city was replacing the brick sidewalks that crumbled under the weight of vehicles... they used bricks instead of stamped concrete that looks like brick..bricks are for walls and patios, not city streets...

then I see a picture in the News-Press that alarmed me...remember when it was discovered that Julia #69 and Carp councilman Joe were having a fling? well, look at this's the opening cerremony for an Orcutt the pic are #69 and north county supervisor Steve Lavagnino..I think that's cougar Julia but maybe I'm wrong...but if it is, I would say WATCH OUT STEVE could end up in a ditch too!

ya got to have friends
it's Tueday and NO EDITORIAL!!! I'm getting very concerned about the News-Press editorial writer Lanny Ebenstein, so I checked his Facebook page out...let's see, he's friends with Don Katich still, that's good.....yooowwza, there's Lucy Sharon Byrnes the anti-homeless chick who lost the last city council election because she dint know how to organize

...there's Lanny's bud Grant House! there's Dr. Dan...there's ol' Clark VanDeventer, the Jesus dude who lost an election awhile back who looks like he's taken up drinking!! Clark says he likes raising money for non-profits because it's "cash in my pocket"....Clark has a blog on Family, somebody is paying for the taxes that tax exempt organizations don't pay!! and that's not good...

there's Andy Coffin, the guy who heads Bravo TV, the Reagan Ranch Center and YMAF..and Noozhawk guy William McFadyen..I bet these two talk about drugs alot!!

but I don't see among Lanny's friends Nipper or Wendy...hmmmmm ..and there seems to be some in-court conservatorship matters with Lanny coming up..maybe Lanny's just too busy to write lies about public workers anymore

blood on the tracks
there is an auction that the Reagan Foundation wasn't too thrilled about..apparently someone is auctioning off some of Ron's blood..the Young Miss America Foundation claims no responsibility for the auction, but one youngster said she'd drink his blood to ward off liberals

LOS ANGELES, May 21 (Reuters) - Ronald Reagan's foundation expressed outrage on Monday at a British company's auction of what it says is a vial of the late U.S. president's blood taken at the hospital where he was treated after a 1981 assassination attempt
PFC Auctions, a company based in Guernsey in the United Kingdom, announced on Sunday that it would sell the vial of blood in an online auction set to end on Thursday.

Hell on wheels
well I don't know what SB mayor Helene's thinking sometimes, but the girl's got moxy!! I think everyone should stop fighting her and let her have her way with Santa Barbara...her will is too strong

and the liquor issue in the valley is getting worse....the wineries offering wine tasting 24 hours a day it seems. and the Indians wanting to exapnd their liquor selling abilites with a liquor license..why do businesses need a license to sell liquor?? well, when I was in the restaurant biz, owners always wanted a liquor license to get more can't bring customers in on food, beer and wine when they want martinis and, I got no problem with drinking..people find out soon enough what they can issue is with drinking and driving.....some folks drink so much they think they can drive impaired and the next thing you know someone's dead again on the Chumash Highway of Death....

but I have no problem with the casino getting a liquor long as the demand is there for stupid entertainment, the casino will be popular

and why did that black girl who killed a DA while driving drunk on the Chumash Highway of Death get more prison time than that white lady who killed someone while driving drunk on the Pass???

black lady: Weapon: Automobile; Alcohol involved
Suspect: Sentenced to 15 to life in prison

white lady: Weapon: Automobile; Alcohol involved
Suspect: Sentenced to one year in prison

probably because the white lady drank White Russians...

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

total eclipse of the heart

another roadside attraction

first I went up the hill towards Ojai to get some sun...I was very pleased to see the thistle growing strong with silver seeds ready to float away..I touched the feathery mass and was surprised at how sticky and strong it was....Mother Nature always knows best....then I see some California poppies looking nice...growing well with the thistle and fennel...there's a narrative in these roadside flowers...there's a raw beauty and survival story here....and oh look...there's some plastic bags on the side of the is from Walmart...

I prefer lizards, fennel and purple thistle to plastic bags on the side of the road...there's a parable in the narrative...I prefer Sears to Walmart..I plan to take these plastic bags, wad them up, and shove them down SB city councilman Frank Hotchkiss' throat!

well, I watched the dark shadows creep over Carp as the eclipse event passed was pretty cool...I looked at the sun and nearly went blind for a few was a nice little respite from then I got two pieces of cardboard and poked a hole in one and held them both up to the sun....and all I saw was the sun shining thru a hole in a piece of cardboard..I've never felt so foolish

then I take a magnifying glass and try to burn the cardboard for making me feel worked!!

then I took some pictures of the sun...I didn't notice anything until I looked at one picture and I see the eclipse happening in the photo!!

it seems something in the camera lens, a prism or whatever, allowed the sun and the moon to be seen in two separate areas of the was weird a bunch of color overtones capturing the can see the actual eclipse in the frame......I don't how this happened, there's some lens refracting principle at work here...

there's more to the picture than meets the eye.....

Monday, May 21, 2012

Little Orphan Andy

tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya tomorrow.....

I've said before that the News-Press is getting skinnier with less and less editorials...they can't muster up a local opinion more than a few times a week now...Lanny's been beating the dead horse of pensions and now he's focused on how many Mexicans go to school....and... it looks like Terry Tyler is long gone...

wait just a minute..can it be??? both Lanny and Terry got dumped I said dumped for Little Orphan Andy Caldwell as the new guest in the editorial dept?? were Lanny's issues and failures just too much for Wendy to put up with??

Andy has a radio show on Mommy Warbuck's AM 1290 which claims he's for traditional values!  this is laughable considering where Andy's nose has been ..up the asses of the rich trustfunders like Wendy, Daddy Warbucks Brooks Firestone, Cowboy Willie, bigfat Nancy Crawford Hall and others too numerous to mention... and the drugs and alcohol running thru these people is worse than a Mexican cartel!!

Andy hangs with Lanny, Joe, and Stoker...these guys are puppets for the rich who wouldn't last one minute in the real see what happened to Joe and Lanny when they tangled with'm the real world, boys...I'm the real world...

the Sunday guestatotial had Andy extolling the virtues of Mike Stoker and Jason Hodge and dissing Hannah-Beth....I've exposed these guys on this blog but geez Mike I just got a robocall from you telling me you are an independent small businessman!....was that a joke??

when Andy pretends he's a moderate and endorses either Stoker or Hodge, he's really saying vote for his Republican pal Stoker..Stoker can't beat Hannah-Beth and has a better shot against Hodge...

make no mistake, Andy is a tool for wealthy CONSERVATIVE ranchers and trust funders in the north county...

and Hodge...very creepy..he joined forces with wifey Fiona Ma, the News-Press and the non-profit Ventura County Ag Ass to sandbag Das Williams when Das visited the Montalvo Strawberry Farm to check out a complaint by a worker...the worker was fired by the way, then re-hired by Montalvo Farms after the Ventura Ag Labor Board found the guy was fired for trying to organize a union..the story is being covered in the Ventura County Star, a far superior paper to the News-Press...fired for union activites..hmmmm

so all the efforts by Jason, Fiona, the News-Press and the VCAA to smear Das Williams backfired....I think Montalvo Farms hired the guy back so they wouldn't get bad press for the Strawberry Festival!

Stoker, Hodge and Hannah-Beth are the choices..whoever gets elected needs to understand that tax increases and spending reductions go hand in hand......wasteful gov't practices like restoring land that doesn't need to be restored must be stopped: and tax loopholes for the rich need to be's really not that hard to figure out..
and Andy writes like he's still in 8th grade...a much better match for Wendy's intellect...
welcome to my world, Little Orphan Andy....

Sunday, May 20, 2012

sympathy for the devil

a Rabbi was having sex with a goat....that's it..that's the joke!! hahaha

I was watching the Worthen One on One Shoggw, better known on this bloggggah as the Mr. Wimpy Show and Mr. Wimpy was hhhgggginterviewing a Rabbi who is rhhhhhhunning for the US Senate...gaagaggeez..some of you gaahhhfolks in SB give the homeless a hard time for the way they look, what about this ggggghhhuy...he looks like hhhhhhhe crawled out from under a pile of cgagagagow dhhhhgggung....(I'm trying to sound like a rabbi here)

I only watched for a few minutes but he went on and on about the evils of socialism and communism and how evil the American union workers are....and Mr. Wimpy just kept nodding his head and looking us with his beady little rat eyes....the Rabbi has a little rep for being a racist nutjob...Nachum Shifren: Racist Rabbi Still Trying to Run For Senate Seat ... Shifren's nutty views in its headline: Rabbi's Speech Called Hateful. and so on....goofshig schmil luck Rabbi!

then I hear some Baptist senator in Mississippi wants to kill people who are gay because the bible says we should...I have no problem with that if that's the way America wants to go, but we need to include other trangressions when we throw out the rule of law in favor of God's Law..

The act of murder is rampant in the Bible. In much of the Bible, especially the Old Testament, there are laws that command that people be killed for absurd reasons such as working on the Sabbath, being gay, cursing your parents, or not being a virgin on your wedding night. In addition to these crazy and immoral laws, there are plenty of examples of God's irrationality by his direct killing of many people for reasons that defy any rational explanation such as killing children who make fun of bald people, and the killing of a man who tried to keep the ark of God from falling during transport. There are also countless examples of mass murders commanded by God, including the murder of women, infants, and children.

The following passages are a very small percentage of the total passages approving of murder in the Bible. They are divided here into three parts: 1) Capital Punishment Crimes, 2) God's Murders for Stupid Reasons, 3) Murdering Children, and 4) Miscellaneous Murders. This list is long, but it barely scratches the surface of all the murders approved of in the Bible.

1) Capital Punishment Crimes:

Kill People Who Don't Listen to Priests


Anyone arrogant enough to reject the verdict of the judge or of the priest who represents the LORD your God must be put to death. Such evil must be purged from Israel. (Deuteronomy 17:12 NLT)

Kill Witches


You should not let a sorceress live. (Exodus 22:17 NAB)

Kill Homosexuals

"If a man lies with a male as with a women, both of them shall be put to death for their abominable deed; they have forfeited their lives." (Leviticus 20:13 NAB)

Kill Fortunetellers


A man or a woman who acts as a medium or fortuneteller shall be put to death by stoning; they have no one but themselves to blame for their death. (Leviticus 20:27 NAB)

Death for Cursing Parents

1) If one curses his father or mother, his lamp will go out at the coming of darkness. (Proverbs 20:20 NAB)

2) All who curse their father or mother must be put to death. They are guilty of a capital offense. (Leviticus 20:9 NLT)

Death for Adultery


If a man commits adultery with another man's wife, both the man and the woman must be put to death. (Leviticus 20:10 NLT)

Death for Fornication


A priest's daughter who loses her honor by committing fornication and thereby dishonors her father also, shall be burned to death. (Leviticus 21:9 NAB)

Kill Nonbelievers

They entered into a covenant to seek the Lord, the God of their fathers, with all their heart and soul; and everyone who would not seek the Lord, the God of Israel, was to be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman. (2 Chronicles 15:12-13 NAB)

Kill the Entire Town if One Person Worships Another God


Suppose you hear in one of the towns the LORD your God is giving you that some worthless rabble among you have led their fellow citizens astray by encouraging them to worship foreign gods. In such cases, you must examine the facts carefully. If you find it is true and can prove that such a detestable act has occurred among you, you must attack that town and completely destroy all its inhabitants, as well as all the livestock. Then you must pile all the plunder in the middle of the street and burn it. Put the entire town to the torch as a burnt offering to the LORD your God. That town must remain a ruin forever; it may never be rebuilt. Keep none of the plunder that has been set apart for destruction. Then the LORD will turn from his fierce anger and be merciful to you. He will have compassion on you and make you a great nation, just as he solemnly promised your ancestors. "The LORD your God will be merciful only if you obey him and keep all the commands I am giving you today, doing what is pleasing to him." (Deuteronomy 13:13-19 NLT)

Kill Women Who Are Not Virgins On Their Wedding Night


But if this charge is true (that she wasn't a virgin on her wedding night), and evidence of the girls virginity is not found, they shall bring the girl to the entrance of her fathers house and there her townsman shall stone her to death, because she committed a crime against Israel by her unchasteness in her father's house. Thus shall you purge the evil from your midst. (Deuteronomy 22:20-21 NAB)
totally kosher!!

Saturday, May 19, 2012

young girl...

get outta my mind, my love for you is way outta line, better run girl, you're much too young girl

WTF indeed! Rob Lowe? Rob Lowe is promoting tourism for California?? for Santa Barbara?? for fluffieyuppiemuppiewuppies?

he's on the cover of a tourism mag in a wetsuit...Rob Lowe..the child molester?? Rob Lowe is a pussy so why is he promoting tourism unless we want pedophiles to come to town...JesusFucking Christ I'm getting sick of all these useless fucks trying to hog the spotlight to boost their sagging careers...

remember at 22, Rob videotaped himself and a 16 year old girl having sex....'My sex tape scandal was the greatest thing that happened to me,' admits Rob Lowe, because it got him to face his alcoholism...blame it on the booze!!

from 2010: And that’s why last year’s malarkey between Rob Lowe and his nannies was so unexpected. You may remember that last year Rob Lowe sued all of his staff - some for allegedly swearing, some for allegedly having sex on his bed and then stealing all of his medicine and, in the case of nanny Jessica Gibson, for allegedly lying about giving him a massage.

But more of a surprise was that Jessica Gibson countersued Rob Lowe, claiming that he liked nothing more than to flap his penis around at her and try and shove his hands down her knickers. What really happened between them? We’ll never know, because both Rob Lowe and Jessica Gibson have decided to drop their lawsuits. EW reports:
Both sides have reportedly requested that their respective lawsuits be dismissed, according to court records. Lawyers for both sides declined to comment to People, so it’s not known if a financial settlement was involved.

first of all, Rob can't act..he's a hack.. has no talent..I've seen him in a movie and he can't act...second of all, he had some issues with his housekeeper....chased her around the house for sex or something like that....thirdly, Rob is a pussy..ohh, I already said that..well it bears repeating, goddamit..

and then you might remember that pouty Rob complained to Wendy McCuckoo (who had child porn on her News-Press computer by the way) about a reporter who was doing her job, attending a planning commission meeting wherein Rob was ready to build a house on Picacho Lane in Montecito and he stated his address before the cameras....then when the reporter printed the story in the News-Press, Rob complained to Wendy about it and Wendy had a hissy fit and fired the reporter and then went fucking crazy and you see the results of that today....

and Rob is friends with groper Arnold who made a mess of the California economy trying to act like a Governor...and Rob even showed up with Arnold posing in front of the cameras during the Tea Fire...I still don't know why Rob was there....

so whoever's idea it was to hire Rob Lowe to promote tourism is, to quote Michele Bachman, a fucking mental retard with a bullet....

geez, the state is the most visual, stunning and beautiful place on earth... the Lost Coast, Big Sur, Southern California beaches and entertainment, the Valley ranches and wineries and history...and these faux-society dames pick Rob Lowe to promote California...

why does California need Rob Lowe??

it doesn't...

Friday, May 18, 2012

on the radio

music is indeed the universal language...

Donna Summer dies...well that's a bummer because I really liked her...she was a little soul and disco and R&B..."on the radio" is a favorite....good time music with some attitude..a great voice and sexy as hell...

but on a brighter note, I was reading the Coastal View and saw an interesting concert upcoming at the Plaza Playhouse Theater in Carp.....Danny O'Keefe and Bob Lind...Saturday May 26...7:00 PM... (ticket says says 8pm)
these guys go way back....Bob Lind for the brilliant "Elusive Butterfly" and Danny O'Keefe for all his music, beginning with "Good Time Charlie's got the Blues"....O'Keefe caught the singer songwriter wave in the 1970s and he is one of the best

I always loved Lind's "Elusive Butterfly"...the string arrrangement was extra nice and done by Jack Nitzsche before Neil Young got a hold of him...Lind's influence was all over Neil's first album and the Buffalo Springfield as well...

Two substantial men in the musical industry, Lenny Waronker and Jack Nitzsche, took the 23 year-old Lind under their wing. Waronker, who was operating Metric Music Publishing (he would later work for Warner Brothers Records in an executive capacity) offered the contract to Lind. Nitzsche, who died in 2002, wore comfortably the two hats of arranger and producer. In his former duty, Nitzsche created the “wall” for Phil Spector’s famous “wall of sound” recordings, his creative usage of strings raising the standard. For years, the Lind-Nitzsche pairing had been forgotten with the exception of the “Elusive Butterfly” single. A reappraisal of their recordings (two LPs, unreleased material, and a few non-album tracks) occurred in 2007 when England’s Big Beat label released a CD called Bob Lind Elusive Butterfly: The Complete Jack Nitzsche Sessions. It presents a different side to Nitzsche’s musical genius. Instead of the melodrama of “You Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’” or the Wagnerian splendor of “And Then He Kissed Me,” Nitzsche’s arrangements were subtle, floating over Lind’s strong vocals like cumulus clouds. It sounded more like the Nitzsche arrangements that were to come (Buffalo Springfield’s “Expecting to Fly”) than his work with Spector...

SDT: How did you and Danny O’Keefe organize this current tour? Will the program be a songwriter’s swap or will there be separate sets?

BL: No, Danny does his thing and I do mine. We may do a couple duets at the end of the night if we’re in the mood, but it’s basically O’Keefe sings O’Keefe and Lind sings Lind. As to how it came together? My manager, Jill Guerra, is about 99 percent responsible for that. It started out with me sending Danny, whom I’ve never met, an email. I’ve always loved his songs, notably “Magdalene” and “Just Like a Girl Again.” One night I was playing around on YouTube, revisiting some of his songs. Just on a whim I found his website and wrote him what amounts to a fan letter. I told him I appreciated the care he takes with his writing, never settling for a line that “will work okay,” when with a little more patience, he can find the right word. (à la “She talks in splice and splinters, she laughs like breaking glass…stealing all my images till there’s nothing left to say.”) I’ve known enchanting [women] like that and fallen under their power. So I wrote and told him I appreciated his care and honesty. I was delighted to get back an email from him saying he respected my work as well.

LA in the 60s was a music mecca where all these young guys and gals with extraordinary talent and guts produced some really great music and played clubs like the Troubedour, Whiskey and the Palamino....and we kids listened to all that stuff on the's in our blood now

Neil's ode to Los Angeles showed up on the Time Fades Away was raunchy and brilliant..."city in the smog, don't you wish that you could be here too?"

well, if the Plaza keeps doing things like this, the future looks good for this little for art's sake..this is a nonprofit I can support 101%!

Thursday, May 17, 2012

I'm not supposed to care

at Aviva, we are committed to bringing humanity back to life insurance...

does my voice scare you?? it should..I'm a little robot girl who wants to kill you...and steal your life insurance you think I'm kidding...I don't think you should never doubt Aviva, they let me do anything I want....the reason I'm talking to you like this with this little killer little girl voice, is because I want you to Aviva, we all want you to die, so buy some life insurance from us and they'll send me to your house , where I will take a knife and stab you in your heart...

and not even care if you die....and you will die..soon

bombs away

dream babies...

so I go out to Atlantic Aviation in Goleta to check out the WWII bombers...I used to fly the B17 when I was in the war circa and Clint and Burton and William Holden...we were the Flying Tigers...oh John Wayne too..

but we'd fly these over Germany and bomb the Krauts to the end Hitler was a nervous wreck, a withered little man who committed suicide....just as well...and the Emperor of Japan..we got his ass too...good way to end a war...drop the big one

I've watched many war documentaries and these giant icons were always flying in some badass formation..a low rumbling sound that I love...

oooowwww...I haven't been to the airport lately and it's rather nice out here..wide open spaces with lots of cool non-native plants everywhere...

so I get to the Atlantic Aviation which is very clean and nice..I go inside and pass thru a gate to get to the planes.... the planes...I was waiting my turn to get inside the bombers as others checked them out, I climb up a step ladder and there's little compartments, ammo, gun turrets...concave windows, oxygen cylinders...50 caliber gun machine guns...they are huge!!

I paid the twelve bucks for a self guided tour... it was well worth it...for a moment I was flying in a real liberator..these machines are just too cool for words..and all the rivets from Rosie and art work!! what skill!

I placed myself in the gun turret..the guns were soo easy to operate and maneuver, it was like power steering! I could have cleared the tarmac....not that I would....I'm just sayin' I could if I had to....

so on the way back I hit the hill in Summerland and glance over at the ocean like I always do..I see two large things sticking up out of the water...I pull off at the exit and go to Lookout Park....I check out what I think I saw and it was gone..just a couple of paddleboarders way out there..then I hear later that night a horse went swimming at the Loon Point beach..and it seems everyone freaked out and all the Coast Guard patrols boats and animal people came to help....even #69 had something to say about even though she wasn't involved in the rescue..I think she was peeved no one called her!!

but I don't know what all the fuss was about...haven't people ever heard of sea horses??

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Aye, Calypso!

To sail on a dream on a crystal clear ocean,
to ride on the crest of a wild raging storm
To work in the service of life and living,
in search of the answers of questions unknown
To be part of the movement and part of the growing,
part of beginning to understand,

if I were a rich man, I wouldn't be writing this stupid blog everyday now would I? no I'd be sailing the seven seas and flying the wild blue yonder and eating fois gras in France and caviar in Spain...I'd be out boning Persian princesses...but I'm not rich compared to Wendy McCaw..well, actually I am rich compared to Wendy in some ways...but moneywise, no, she's richer than me..I think...

Aye Calypso the places you've been to,
the things that you've shown us,
the stories you tell
Aye Calypso, I sing to your spirit,
the men who have served you so long and so well
Hi dee ay-ee ooo doo-dle oh
oo do do do do do doo-dle ay yee
doo-dle ay ee
(John Denver wrote that fantasic song and it's a song about Jacques Cousteau's boat, the Calypso...John and Jacques were the real deal....Wendy and Micheal Cousteau are not the real deal....just a little side note to our story)

but maybe Wendo's riches are getting smaller while mine're richer than Wendy too, but Wendy's got one thing we ain't got: a yacht..

I will never own a yacht....I do however own a bicycle...ummm, so when I heard that Wendy's yacht the Calixe got rammed in Florida in a "bingle", I got all tingly..I didn't know what bingle was until yesterday, but now I do..well actually I'm not sure what it means but they used in the story...Wendy's yacht involved in a bingle....

ok so you know that she's suing a rich Aussie mogul guy named Solomon Lew for smacking into her yacht in the boat yard in Florida...Wendy's toy got dent in it..a $500,000 dent it that's rich!!! my initial thought about this was... WAY TO GO, LEW!! you're a real one percenter!!! Good on ya!

Like the dolphin who guides you, you bring us beside you
To light up the darkness and show us the way
For though we are strangers in your silent world
To live on the land we must learn from the sea
To be true as the tide and free as a wind swell
Joyful and loving in letting it be
Aye Calypso the places you've been to,
the things that you've shown us,
the stories you tell
Aye Calypso, I sing to your spirit,
the men who have served you so long and so well

well, you gotta be pretty toasted to waste a yacht in the harbor and by toasted I mean Foster's...that's Australian for beer, mate..

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

battle on the high seas!

breaking news...exclusive!!

Wendy sues another billionaire for ramming her yacht in Florida!

RETAIL magnate Solomon Lew has become embroiled in a legal stoush with a fellow billionaire after their luxury super yachts collided in a Florida shipyard, causing damage estimated at $US500,000.

The resulting US court case against Mr Lew and his 177-foot (54-metre) yacht Maridome is the latest legal battle involving the billionaire, who in recent months has warred with the former spouses of his children over control of tens of millions of dollars held in a family trust and clashed with Mount Eliza locals over a pool built on Crown land without a permit.

Wendy McCaw, who made her fortune in mobile phones and now owns Californian newspaper the Santa Barbara News-Press, alleges that in mid-February Maridome rammed her 188-foot motor yacht Calixe as it lay in its berth at the BAE Systems shipyard in Jacksonville.

read here:

I'll have more tomorrow!

hot fun

in the summer time!!

it's painful watching Joe Armendariz, the lame stewed duck on the Carp City Council, try to sound relevant...Joe speaks with a forked tongue...usually there's a political ad, unnecessary words, rambling essays on faux-economics issues and it seems Joe likes to hear himself he told a guy making a presentation for the city on tourism, "there's a narrative in the numbers"...

I don't know what Joe's talking about but councilman Brad Stein usually smacks him down when his tongue gets outta line....Councilwoman Reddington has a way with words too..both Joe and Kathleen talk in circles

at issue on Monday was money..the City of Carp needs some, can't blame unions, and wants a few extra bucks in hotal bed tax..put it to a vote.....when I think of all the dirty filthy things tourists do in hotel beds in my city, I think they should be taxed...the hotels are against it of course but it passed with only Joe voting no....

the folks talked alot about promoting tourism in Carp and Reddington wanted to fill the empty store fronts...well there is a business cycle she may not know about...some businesses come and go and some have been in Carp forever.. I visit Reynoldo's Bakery a few times a week because they are a good simple business...nothing too fancy..

the city did no favors to local restaurants when they banned sidewalk dining...some restaurants put a few tables on the sidewalks for the customers and I always enjoyed that but the city snatched them away....the ban should be dropped immediately especially for the summer because nothing says friendly like a sidewalk cafe...

the best way to promote Carp is tell it like it's a friendly clean beach city with a rich old west and agriculture history...we got the Avocado Festival..the Rods and Roses Show on the 4th of add a few more festivals..maybe a Surf Festival on Santa Claus Lane..maybe start the first annual Flea Festival on the Bluffs and invite your dogs!

and it doesn't help us to have a councilmember arrested twice for crashing his car while drunk promoting tourism...this isn't Montana, you know

 just let people walk around and enjoy the town instead of cordoning off the state park for unnecessary native plant restorations..don't make kids afraid to walk on the grass!! get back to basics and people will come..

stuffiness will kill this town....the Chamber of Commerce needs to stop complaining and get to work

as Tommy Bahama says...Carp needs to learn to "relax" again...