Monday, June 3, 2013

Atomic Dog

it's funkadelic!

well I went into Santa Barbara on Monday and swung by the Funk Zone and lower State Street...I haven't been here in awhile and it looks like Lebanon...bunch of dark skinned men and burned out buildings! hardly any streets left...the old Californian Hotel a shadow of its former self...had a few beers in Rocky Galenti's once but got bored...
and now? not the way I remember State Street....the freeflow is gone...was it broken? is this the fix?? where's the beach, man??? where's the mojo???

anyway I went looking for all the new wine tasting rooms in the Funk Zone since the freebie weekly papers like the Sentinel and Independent are incessantly writing about them...just what we need, another wine tasting room!

well I saw the old Cowboy Star Guitars and the Mermaid and Channel Islands Surfboards...those are cool and some art on the walls...hippies!!!

there's a fancy new building that houses Pali winery...looks like Macy's.... some dog walkers here...some Wendy-types, oblivious to reality..

well I don't see a Renaissance here..just more wine tasting rooms.. more than is necessary..more than the number of liquor stores on Milpas!! corks and kunin tasting rooms have the same color scheme...both the wine???

Wine Tasting Tips
look, let's be honest...all wine tastes basically the same...grapes are grapes..juicy and sweet unless you like sour grapes or grapes of wrath....but wine is a simple yet elegant thing and here's some etiquette to consider when visiting the new tasting rooms...


Major faux pas committed
by visitors to wine tasting rooms:

Toting screaming kids under age 3
Elbowing your way to the bar and scarfing down food samples
Thinking you need to tip
Smoking a cigarette right before you sip
Wearing heavy perfume
Swilling every last drop because you're not certain where to spit
Tussling over the tasting fee
making funny faces
Arriving tipsy
Breaking the dry-to- sweet tasting order rule
Chewing gum
above all else, DON'T UPSET THE WINE!!!

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